The game never tells you when you should go grind adventure maps to power-level. You have to spend 20 minutes fighting a losing battle in story mode and eat shit super hard when it demands 20 fucking things of you at once first.
I forgot how FUCKING insufferable Hyrule Warriors is. "HEY! FIGHT DARUNIA! AND CAPTURE FOUR BASES BY YOURSELF! AND GET THE SKULLTULA! AND STOP THE BOULDER ATTACKS! AND BE AT TWO BASES ACROSS THE MAP FROM EACH OTHER!"
GO FUCK YOURSELF. You gave me NO other characters for this map, you cunts!
I wish I could describe how daunting the idea of 100%ing Hyrule Warriors Deluxe is. Every adventure map A-Ranked, every character maxed with all their weapons, Master Sword awakened, all Skulltulas, all heart containers, all fairy skills... this game has more content than I've ever seen in 1 title.
I wish we understood the world like a normal person. I wish we saw things like normal people do. I wish we could experience the simple, everyday things normal people experience. Being different means not getting that, though. You learn to handle it. But it does get difficult some times. That's all.
We'll be fine. I'll be okay. A bad night is just a bad night. There's always a tomorrow, even if it seems distant, and no feeling is permanent. Being sad is as tiresome as being angry is. It's impossible to remain in either state for long. For me, anyway. I'll be back to normal soon enough.
To my friends - even if I don't have the capability to say it, even in text form - know that I do care and I do love you. I just don't really understand fully what that means. You're all important to me. I appreciate you all being a part of our life, even if it's difficult at times.
Whatever the future holds, and whatever iteration of us is active to see that end, I can't say. Maybe one day we'll be whole again, and feel safe, and that love isn't something to shy away from out of fear. But if not, so be it. I'll do what I can to keep moving us forward. It's why I exist.
Whatever the case, it's best to just keep to ourself and stay in our own lane. I can't risk either of the other two waking up. I have to keep looking forward. Some nights are harder than others. But there's some goal to reach before we can stop moving, and we haven't reached it yet.
What split us also scarred us. And because we've only ever experienced negative forms of 'love,' it terrifies us. They say you should tell your friends you love them, but is that something people really do? It seems alien to us. People can just say that and it's a normal event?
Some days, I feel Alexis' anger. Some days, I feel Gwen's sadness. Maybe I'm less acceptance and more resignation. I understand them both, even if I don't agree in the way they expressed themselves. How could I even think we were capable of loving someone else when we can't even love ourself?
I don't know if it's possible for 'us' to just be a proper 'I' again some day. But I feel like if it isn't, there's no point in seeking out any kind of personal comfort. I can't hurt someone because I can't control the others sharing space in here. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be safe.
I'm not even sure any of us would know what love would look like, even if it hit us over the head. We've only ever known tainted forms of it. Each of us that have piloted this ship have had different ideas of what it might look like, all wildly different, skewed by our personalities.
I don't have the energy or desire to break free of the confines of this cabin. Some days, I wonder what it would be like to have a normal life. Someone to take care of us. But I can't allow that. We're too... unstable? Maybe that isn't the right term. We're a lot. I can't subject someone to that.
Some days it feels like I'm the glue holding together a sinking ship. Just because I feel like I have to accept the hand fate has dealt doesn't mean I have to like it. But there's no point in fighting back. I - we - need to be kept contained. All of my energy is spent keeping this ship afloat.
For awhile, Xbox users were getting bans because when they loaded into a match, it was doing something dumb like detecting a mouse and keyboard that didn't fucking exist so players couldn't MOVE. BHVR is SO incompetent. Took them almost 10 years to add COLOR ACCESSIBILITY OPTIONS, ffs...
I love being tunneled out of a match so fucking fast in #DeadByDaylight that BHVR's shitty 'you tried going next' protection activates and gives me a ban.
Fucking most incompetent, worthless developers of any game. Can't be bothered to fix bugs, can't be bothered to make it run over PS5 wifi...
I remember a video rental place sold... if not these then something very like them in a bit jar up by the register. Always on the lookout for characters I didn't have...
If you were scared of Greys, this shit was the worst thing to happen to you while watching TV at night as a kid. I remember running out of the living room when it came on. Bite-sized bursts of Halloween energy breaking the confines of the season to give you goosebumps in May!
Watched The Last Dragon through again tonight for the first time in ages.
Man, that movie holds up. What a good damn film. That movie's over an hour-forty long and doesn't feel like it at all. Also has an absolutely stacked soundtrack!
Had this stuck in my head today. If Kevin released a whole barbershop quartet-style album, I'd be all over it.
Also, I always forget it's Mike lipsyncing Kevin's singing here. Was like "Wait, he didn't shave for this, and he didn't Cesar Romero it, so... ohhh."
www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bV4...
Insomnia thoughts...
Having recently finished watching all non-KTMA eps of MST3K...
How the heck did Kevin Murphy never record like... multiple albums? Dude had a hell of a set o' pipes on him. Not sure if he can still belt out the tunes nowadays, but it wouldn't surprise me, honestly.
DSP losing to Misty because he refuses to level his team is ridiculous, even for him.
I wanna see that dorkwad play MMBN. It has a forced tutorial where you have to follow instructions. He'd never get past it then go "Woooow, how was I supposed to know what to do?!"
By READING, Phil! :)
I'll treat survivors how they treat me. If they're silly and here to have fun, or do something funny like Plot Twist mid-chase, I'll probably do an 8-hook round. If they're little assholes sweating their balls off during THE BP-farming event, fuck 'em. Eat dirt. #DeadByDaylight
Never be friendly as a killer in #DeadByDaylight. Survivors will always be rude little assholes. Treat them like they deserve. Slug them. Tunnel them. Camp them. Do not bring BP offerings that give them any extra. If they want to make games stressful and unfun, play by their rules.
And now that I've watched all non-KTMA MST3K episodes... here's the definitive, scientifically-accurate rankings. As you can see, Godzilla vs Megalon is the best episode ever, and Teen-Age Crime Wave was a waste of everyone's time.
Now to wait for the RiffTrax Experiments...
Fried the everloving shit outta every part of the inside of my mouth on pizza rolls I wasn't willing to sit and wait to cool below 'molten lava' temperature.
I regret nothing.
I dunno what type of material the stickers on the chainsaws are made of. It's a -very- stiff material. I'm sure there's a proper name for it. Really nice for a big, flat surface, though. Oddly satisfying to apply, which is a rare occurrence for stickers. #Gunpla #Plamo
"yOu ShOuLdN't SaY bAd ThInGs AbOuT tHe DeAd, DoN't Be PoLiTiCal!"
Fuck off. If someone's an asshole in life, don't expect me to be sad when they die. That isn't being political, that's saying "Fuck that guy for being a shithead towards people like me when he was alive."
Some people, man.
Really hoping the @rifftrax.com MST3K eps starts with Mike and the Bots in the basement (or -a- basement, it doesn't have to be the same basement!) finishing Diabolik, since the original series ended with them starting The Crawling Eye. I dunno, it'd just be a cute nod to it.
Good lord, the arm joints were a nightmare! Because when fully inserted... it cannot turn the way it needs to sit. I had to pry it up, which was no small task, and took around 15 minutes, just to rotate it. The rest went smoothly, though! User error! Make sure you line that shit up 1st! #Gunpla