These tasted tragically weird

ANUBIS: (presses button with paw) [guilty]
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good

Think about how much the clip of “Yub Nub” from the original cut of RotJ will be played the day it happens

hat that says "if you're not masturbating to me I can only assume you're masturbating against me"

The Algorithm has misinterpreted my breeding kink

this comforts me in some small way

<nods sagely> You speak of the strokethrough

You have to defend the right for art and media to be "sexually gratifying"

You have to defend "gratification"

You have to defend the right for people to get off nasty style

You need to be more disgusted with people who want to say what people can do with their own time and money than x or y kink

A handjob tutorial series called ‘Squeezing the Means of Production’

i’m more intrigued by what grimace’s dick would feel like

when youre at the escape room and your big metal cock ring falls off and rolls down your pant leg and someone thinks thats part of the puzzle <<<<<<<< #FirstWorldProblems

Weird agency trying to desluttify our female MC: We think this will do quite well to make the Ghostbusters cartoon more wholesome

Me: [tossing folder across table] It's called Janinecest. Teens across America are already drawing before and after Janine kissing. Try again

Average Democratic politician: Zohran Mamdani must answer for the Suez Crisis

Average Democratic voter: <goes to a rally in the pouring rain and holds up a picture of the Nuremberg gallows with various Trump administration figures' faces glued on>

Sooner or later you're gonna have to come to terms with the fact that you can't combat creating concentration camps and kidnapping people off the streets by voting harder

My dear friend who’s dog sitting Halwyn makes just the best videos

Husb [visibly shaking, holding the Warhammer 40K 7th edition rulebook in front of me]: hey wanna hear about some cool stuff

ppls reactions to kinks they don't like is so overblown, noone is forcing you to jerk off to it. noone is grabbing your cock while forcefully holding you down. tying you to a chair and buzzing you with a wand till you cant see through tears. noone is forcing their fingers in your mouth. theyre not g

Fondue in Switzerland 🇨🇭

hell yea fluid

it bums me out how miserable you guys all seem dating. i used to LOVE dating. it’s supposed to be fun! low stakes sex tourism of your very own city! what have the apps wrought upon us all!

If you had a 15 year old who said this to you and seemed to believe it, you’d be up all night panicking about what it’s going to cost you in tutors to get them into the 2nd-to-last ranked public university in your state.

the purest horny is that which hits us when the sun is at its zenith