This is like when your unmmarried auntie who's lived with her 'friend' for twenty years that she goes on holiday with tells you she has some news.

This is the closest you’ll ever get to hearing that company accept that they’ve fully biffed something.

Just tried to write the word 'seven' with a C at the start. That's how today's going.

It's a long statement which they didn't provide any alt text for themselves. They thank the fans, explain that they had to make significant changes to playing conditions on the day to account for things like the turf moving and player protection from hitting the back of the arena, and end by saying they must and will continue to do better throughout the season.

It's not great when you're having to put out a press statement after an opening victory saying you know you have to do a lot better.

I attended Scotland’s first American Football Arena League game - was it worth the ticket price? American Football returned to Glasgow this past weekend with the launch of the Glasgow Tartans in the International Arena League (IAL), but it wasn’t without controversy.

I hadn't seen many photos or coverage online about the Glasgow Tartans playing their first IAL game, including from their own social media accounts. The one photo and piece of coverage I have seen of it maybe explains why: www.scotsman.com/sport/sport-...

Menswear writer here. 👋 Let me tell you why you shouldn't wear an armband like that. 🧵

And nobody left at Pink News to question or challenge it, as they’ve moved to a ‘reporter-free newsroom’.

It’s cool how everything sucks now 😅

A section of stone-paved road. Most of the stones are light grey, but with darker grey or yellow ones dotted or clumped around.

Not super clear from this shot, but they're laying a road around George Square in Glasgow atm with light grey, dark grey and pale yellow stones, and I don't really like how it looks. It's fine with older cobbles, because they have so many shades. Might look less obvious once it's worn in a bit.

28 November 1982 LWT - Weekend World clock intro YouTube video by The TV Museum

Weird how many current affairs shows back in the day would have banging theme tunes: www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lSF...

BBC Headline: Our dream family home is beside a dead animal dumping ground.

Seems like a weird thing to wish for, but fair enough.

A big blue Thwomp, with Mario stood next to it. Wish I could eat mushrooms to fix me.

Rolled over in bed onto my dodgy arm, and made a noise exactly like a Thwomp from Super Mario 64. Yeesh.

An online advert reading “you wouldn’t ignore a warning light on your car. Don’t ignore you body.”

Oh I absolutely would

That sounds amazing. Swear I was over-encumbered for over 90% of that game. When I finally off-loaded all my hoard, it felt like I’d unlocked a turbo cheat code 😅

Sky commentary trying to tell me how fun and joyful everything about Cherki is, while his immediate instinct after scoring is to sullenly try and wind up the opposing fans. What fun. Much joy.

I love football, but it’s a sport chock-full of dickheads. <insert Always Has Been meme>

Comment on a BBC Radio Scotland post promoting Breaking The News. "Silly nonsense on serioius subjects from a failed radio station - this is our NATIONAL radio station FGS"

I've been replaying this comment from Facebook, about the Radio Scotland comedy show Breaking The News, over and over in my head. I honestly think the show should adopt "Silly nonsense on serioius subjects" as a tagline, and keep the spelling mistake. Wait until they find out what HIGNFY is up to.

Still from a Scottish Labour YouTube advert. “Scotland needs CHANGE” slogan in front of an aerial view of Glasgow.

Frequency of Scottish Labour adverts on YouTube is doing my head in, partly because half of them are just ‘Look! It’s a hill! It’s a glen! There’s Glasgow! Vote Scottish Labour.’

I know 20s is short, but maybe put one policy point in there. (‘We can beat the SNP’ is not a policy point. And false.)

Goodness knows that there’s a myriad of issues with YouTube, but I am glad we’re moving into an era where TV companies and channels are just uploading full clips and episodes straight on there, instead of making you try and remember or work out which streaming app it’s on.

FULL EPISODE | Season 1 Episode 1 | Zero Stars YouTube video by tlc uk

I thought I was done with TV companies paying comedians to go on holiday, but I did like the first episode of Zero Stars, where Roisin Conaty and Sara Pascoe go to places with dodgy reviews. They don’t end up anywhere truly grim, but it’s a fun angle, and they’re great together: youtu.be/89TZUPAXeME

It’s my own fault for looking, but MAN have I seen some amount of baw-heid comments on Facebook this week. That male loneliness epidemic seems to be hitting hard. I know I’m one to talk, but some folk could really do with unplugging the router for a day.

45 Seconds with Fouracres | SNL UK YouTube video by Saturday Night Live UK

SNL have finally put up 45 seconds with Fouracres www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fkt...

I don't recall any previous transformative technologies that had to be sold to the public so hard. No one in 1999 was going, "Guys. Cell phone? It's coming, whether we like it or not. I think it's important, FOR WOMEN ESPECIALLY, to learn about cell phone. So that we're not left behind!!"

Screen that says “Congratulations on winning the snooker championship”, while showing a flaming metal trophy on a snooker table. Feels like a fire hazard.

Inspired by the start of the World Championship, I finally got round to winning the (only) tournament in Snooker Nation Championship 2019. I wonder who’ll be lifting the fiery brazier in Sheffield this year?

Turns out this week's Fantasy Premier League team selection probably needed more thought than the eight minutes I'd left myself before the deadline. 'Crap! Are their team playing twice this week?! Get them in! No idea if they've played in the last month - just get them in! Free Hit! Send it, chef!'

"Since serving as an independent councillor, I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on how I can best use my time and energy to deliver real change"

I guess a fortnight is a long time in politics.

BAFTA pulling a trailer for an autobiographical game about surviving sexual assault only hours before it was said to be a part of a showcase is an exceptionally bad look.

Replace Greg Davies and drop the comedians: how to fix Taskmaster After 21 series, any comedy show would need a shake-up. Here's how it can keep its edge

Subscribe to read which steps your intrepid reporter believes must be taken to repair what is consistently one of the best shows on television, and one which has just had another six full series commissioned? You know what, i, if that is your real name? I think I'm good.

inews.co.uk/culture/tele...

“The rich are getting richer and you are the one paying for it, whilst the government sets us against each other.” accompanied by The Vault Boy from Fallout kicking the Monopoly Guy up the bum. Vault Boy has a small anarchist symbol on his outfit.

I admire the sentiment, but I’m not sure the iconography is the best piece of media literacy I’ve ever seen, even with the tiny anarchist symbol.

Have you visited the #RenownPictures SPRING SALE yet? From #VivienLeigh to #Eurotrash it's all there! Books, DVDs, CDs, Audio Books, Blu-rays and much more! Don't delay! Grab yourself a bargain, while stocks last! buff.ly/T90EnHb

Not only do I believe that election manifesto promises should be legally binding in some way, but I also think ruling parties should be asked serious questions about why all of these great ideas to improve people’s lives only come out at election time. Cost Of Living Crisis didn’t start in March.

I think Meg White is a good drummer just by the standards of being a good drummer but I think she’s an exceptional drummer by the standards of having her extremely strange husband come home one day and say that they were starting a band and had to dress alike and also she’s his sister now