I think I could get my life could be on the right track if I just get a new job and also move somewhere else and maybe start Ozempic and also become 8 or so years younger and also be smarter and better at stuff.
The best thing we can do to protect trans right is encourage Donald to crank those tariffs up as much as possible.
"Gay rights were won by appealing to the moderates"
"Gay rights were won using radical protests"
Both incorrect. Gay rights were won because America was so mad at George Bush over the 2008 recession that they decided to become less homophobic out of spite.
For any of my Connecticut-based followers, I'll be performing in a standup show this sunday at 9 in Hartford. Come check it out!
seateaimprov.com/event/198168...
The pessimist in me says the world is going to keep getting worse forevee
The glass half full person in me says I was extremely lucky to have gotten to experience humanity's best years, making me better off than past and future generations.
Accidentally burning your hand on the hotel waffle maker is a perfect human experience because the lasting pain is too weak to be particularly irksome but persistent enough to keep reminding you you're alive.
It doesn't work if you do it on purpose. It's got to be an accident.
I think instead of using "House" and "Senate," every US state should have a unique name for its legislative bodies.
I'm not an ancom, but if I was I think a fun bit would be to respond to news about shoplifting the way conservatives respond to news about mass shootings. Like, every time there's some viral video on rw Twitter of people stealing from CVS, QT with "this is proof private property laws don't work."
In the Animaniacs reboot, they had a "Catch-up Song," where the protagonists learn about the events that happened in America since the original show ended in 1999. But it makes no mention of 9/11. Which leaves me wondering: do the Animaniacs know the towers are gone?
A sign next to a door says "Computer & Information Sciences & Technology", then "-CIS & T-" then "No food or drink"
Inclusion win! This science lab allows the cis and T to use it!
All this news about the Zelda movie and we still don't know who's playing Morshu.
You can make fun of the Cuomo ad if you want, but it's really telling that Zohran Mamdani has still not given a clear answer as to whether or not he plans to get the Bill from Schoolhouse Rock pregnant.
The whole GameStop thing feels like if Subway only started their partnership with Jared after he got caught.
Call me a prude but I don't think Takis should include a POV shot of a goblin cranking it in their in-store display.
Just saw a cat food advertisement featuring Garfield. Famously he doesn't eat that. This is an example of how late capitalism flattens all artistic expression into a meaningless spectacle to sell commodities. I feel sick
Posting this here for any of my followers who happen to be from the Southern New England region: my team and I are doing a comedy show in Westerly Rhode Island on October 11.
unitedtheatre.org/shows/improv...
I'm worried my friends might be developing a parasocial relationship towards me. How do I explain to them that the persona they hang out with is simply a character that I'm playing who happens to have the same name as myself, and they've never actually met me?
Shame on all the people exploiting Charlie Kirk's death to push agendas that he was deeply opposed to, like polite disagreement and anti-violence. If you truly respected his legacy you'd carry on his work: being callous and indifferent about someone being shot at a school.
A muscular shirtless man looks at a bird, thinking "I could probably beat that bird in a fight." Meanwhile another bird thinks "WORMS."
Here's a drawing I made today. I call it "Two Birds."
Just saw two pigeons fighting over a food scrap with their beaks. But from a distance it looked like they were passionately kissing.
For any of my Connecticut followers, you can come see the debut of my new improv comedy team in Hartford on Saturday, August 9.
www.eventbrite.com/e/improv-com...
Just found out that the Nostalgia Critic is giving a panel at the same convention as I am, so I'm going to start referring to him as "My colleague Doug."
Zohran Mamdami is going to make Unsleeping City real
What I witnessed today, both in person and online, solidified my belief that using negative polarization to radicalize "normies" towards positions that were previously outside the accepted range of polite politics is not a tactic that only the right has access to. Which is encouraging.
Hey, I totally support your protest, but don't you think this photo is bad optics? I'm just concerned about the optics. I think folks seeing this photo will hurt the optics of the movement I definitely support. That's why I find any photo that I think has bad optics and share it as much as possible.
Just saw two pigeons fight over someone's spilled Cheetos despite that there's clearly enough for both of them to fill up many times over. This really says a lot about society.
A stone pillar with the word "Gaslight" on it
Thank you for the suggestion, Girlboss Obelisk. I'll do that.
The guys who make the "I bought this before Elon went crazy" stickers must be excited to double their potential market.