The Dance of Intimacy
The unspoken agreement is that the Pursuer chases the Distancer forever, but never catches up, and that the Distancer keeps running, but never really gets away
Read: tinyurl.com/27p2dx73
#Autonomy #Codependency #Intimacy #MarriageCounseling #Partners #Relationships #SelfEsteem
Posts by Darlene Lancer, LMFT
Most codependents missed consistent warmth and affection from both of their parents. Read why it's so important. buff.ly/KX2sSYs It can cause feelings of shame and inadequacy. Conquering Shame and Codependency amzn.to/3SRqDIx #parenting #shame #parent #codependency #ODAAT #selflove #selfesteem
Identifying Abusive and Coercive Control and What to You Can Do!
In relationships, control varies from mild to abusive to coercive control. When it’s mild, it can be helpful or annoying. When it’s abusive or coercive, it can be damaging
Read: tinyurl.com/yju6fx87
#Codependency #Narcissistic #Abuse
#grief #loss #codependency #trauma #PTSD #CPTSD #relationships #mentalhealth #breakups #divorce #detachment #lettinggo #Coda #alanon #aca #codependencyrecovery #emotionallyunavailable #avoidant #breakup #divorced #ghosting #love #rejection #loneliness #lettinggo #detachment #detach #letting_go
Control is a symptom of #codependency. Read how to identify the signs that make it different from abusive and coercive #control and how to respond to the latter. whatiscodependency.com/identifying-... Learn to be assertive and set #boundaries bit.ly/29OAWWW #narcissism #communication #relationships
I’m not Perfect – I’m only Human” – How to Beat Perfectionism
Perfectionism can be a blessing or a curse. When it helps us, it lifts our mood, and we can achieve significant accomplishments.
See: tinyurl.com/bdhzprbu
#Perfect #Sabotaging #Relationships #Love #Perfectionism #Dehumanizing #CoWorkers
#relationships #shame #codependency #boundaries #ODAAT #recovery #mentalhealth #selfcare #narcissim #narcissiticabuse
Many of us learned to deny our feelings when it wasn't safe to share them as a child. We found ways not to feel with distraction, caring for others, or #addiction to habits or drugs. #Recovery includes learning to stay with our #feelings. #codependency #grief #anger #sober #healing #mentalhealth
Interdependent Relationship!
To feel free in an interdependent relationship is the goal of recovery. It requires autonomy, self-esteem, and boundaries.
See In Detail: tinyurl.com/z5jv976u
#Autonomy #Boundaries #Interdependent #Recovery #SelfEsteem #Codependency #Relationship #Intimacy #SelfEsteem
Look for my April blog on recognizing control, from mild to abusive to coercive, and what you can do. Sign up at www.whatiscodependency.com
Look for my April blog on recognizing control, from mild to abusive to coercive, and what you can do. Sign up at www.whatiscodependency.com #narcissisticabuse #trauma #PTSD #CPTSD #codependency #narcissist #relationships #shame #recovery #survivor #domesticviolence #IPV
Spiritual Transformation in the Twelve Steps!
The Twelve Steps of Twelve-Step programs can be used to attain spiritual transformation and unshackle the true self from the constraints of the ego.
Check: tinyurl.com/7aefrjrd
#12Steps #AlAnon #Books #CarlJung #Coda#SpiritualTransformation #TwelveSteps
How Codependency Distorts Love and Sexuality!
Love and sexuality can become distorted growing up in a codependent household. Very often, relational trauma quietly shapes children’s self-image and their adult relationships, including sex
Check: tinyurl.com/594xjtxw
#BodyShame #Emotional #Trauma #Sex
Love and sexuality can become distorted in a codependent family. Relational #trauma quietly shapes children's self-image and their adult #relationships. Read how it impacts desire, love, and sex whatiscodependency.com/how-codepend... #love #sex #attachment #codependency #CPTSD #PTSD #recovery #shame
Science Explains Mind Control!
A new study sheds light on how people influence and control our mind. Research on mice, whose brains are remarkably similar to humans, reveals that our brains are affected by those around us.
Read: tinyurl.com/3774ymfm
#Autonomy #BrainStudy #Relationships #Narcissists
This article makes some good points. Until we're in a relationship, we're blind to gaps in our #recovery. #Relationships trigger our #codependent patterns, but they teach us where we need to grow #ODAAT
www.theguardian.com/wellness/202... Learn more in “Codependency for Dummies” amzn.to/1BBcrWO
Signs of Lack of Empathy and What You Can Do!
A lack of empathy is not sufficient for a diagnosis of narcissism but it underlies several narcissistic traits, such as arrogance, entitlement, and being exploitative.
Read: tinyurl.com/5e5nk379
#Alexithymia #Autism #Empathy #Intimacy #Selfishness
Co-Parenting After Divorce!
The following are recommendations for co-parenting after divorce:
1. Tell your children the truth, with simple explanations. Tell them where the other parent is.
Read: tinyurl.com/yzw8srpt
#CoParenting #FatherSon #ParentingAfterDivorce #ParentingPostDivorce #Divorce
Breaking Triangles That Hurt Us and Harm Our Children!
An unstable relationship is like a two-legged table. It can’t stand on its own, but a three-legged table is more stable.
Check: tinyurl.com/3receesj
#Children #CPTSD #ElectraComplex #Family #Intimacy #LoveTriangles #Marriage #Parenting #Trauma
Triangulation is hard to stop. You may not see it if you were triangulated growing up. It causes #trauma, impacting attachment style and #relationships. It can keep us in abusive relationships even when we want to leave! Read how to undo it. buff.ly/AzciTR8#reco... #CPTSD #PTSD #marriage #parenting
Relationship as a Spiritual Path..
What makes us “spiritual” beings? The concept of spirituality is derived from “spiritus,” meaning vitality or breath of life.
Check: tinyurl.com/528862e9
#Compassion #SpiritualLove #SpiritualTransformation #Spirituality #Surrender #Relationship #Life #Faith #Love
Understand #narcissism and projection and how not to absorb it!. whatiscodependency.com/empaths-abus... Dating, Loving, and Leaving a #Narcissist: Essential Tools for Improving or Leaving #Narcissistic and Abusive Relationships whatiscodependency.com/dating-lovin... #NPD #abuse #narcissisticabuse
Steps of Codependency Recovery
The overall goal of codependency recovery is to become a full-functioning individual. That entails knowing, valuing , trusting yourself and expressing yourself in your life and relationships
See: tinyurl.com/2cf2y7pd
#Alanon #Coda #Codependency #Addiciton #Recovery
Codependency results from more than a lack of love. In fact, many codependents were loved. It stems from trauma, shame, and missing internal structure. #codependency #recovery #family #psychology #relationships #ODAAT #selfhealing #mentalhealth #trauma #PTSD #CPTSD #shame
When a Parent Can’t Be Trusted!
When we stop trusting and relying on a parent emotionally at a young age, our self-trust is damaged. Parents and their children are wired to love each other.
Check: tinyurl.com/29k9yrfw
#Attunement #CauseOfToxicShame #Idealization #Narcissistic #Parenting #Trauma
The Stages of Divorce!
Divorce is far more than a court order. There are stages to divorce that much be traversed.
Read: shorturl.at/sO1XS
#Divorce #DivorceLettingGo #EmotionalDivorce #EmotionsOfDivorce #GettingOverDivorce #LegalSeparation #MaritalSeparation #Marriage #StagesOfDivorce
What makes us “spiritual” beings? The concept of spirituality is derived from “spiritus,” meaning vitality or breath of life. When we are connected to that force, like an electric charge, our soul awakes;
Check: shorturl.at/C5c4Y
#Compassion #SpiritualLove #Transformation #Spirituality #Surrender
The Dance of Intimacy
The less room there is to navigate this distance, the more difficult the relationship. There is less anxiety, and hence less demand on the relationship to accommodate a narrow comfort zone.
Check: tinyurl.com/2rkkf9a3
#Anxious #Style #Autonomy #Avoidant #Break-Ups #Codependency
Relationship as a Spiritual Path
What makes us “spiritual” beings? The concept of spirituality is derived from “spiritus,” meaning vitality or breath of life.
Check: tinyurl.com/528862e9
#Compassion #SpiritualLove #SpiritualTransformation #Spirituality #Surrender #Relationship #life #Love #Relation