Me after watching the Game of Thrones finale

I feel like Ben Gvir personally being in the room when Greta Thunberg was being tortured should be bigger news

10 movies to get to know me 🤓

Clown Burgers: NOW WITH 100% AUTHENTIC CLOWN MEAT!!!

I’m what one could generously describe as Paul Giamatti-shaped.

Lost my beard, lemme know if anyone finds it plz 🙏

Scully really wanted a sip

daffy: lithen, bugs, not all of us can be thucking dick all day. some of uth have work to do.

bugs: you wish you were sucking dick as much as i was.

daffy: yeth, i do.

bugs: just admi- wait.

daffy: but that i'm not thucking dick all day still leaveth me with more time to get that bag. grindthet.

Yes son the dog is in heaven & hes a pokemon now. The dog became a pokemon as thats what he desired most within his magic heart when he died

Check out my review for the spooky-ass horror novel I Believe in Mister Bones by @fuckmaxbooth.bsky.social! It’s BONE-chilling 💀

www.goodreads.com/review/show/...

Fuckin tulpas, am I right?!

(seeing FBI agents sprinting in my direction as I'm being stabbed) Oh thank god I'm--(they run past me and tackle a guy who's flipping off a tesla)

*rips a bodacious ten-second fart that should have been banned by the Geneva Conventions* M’lady.

Wake up and smell the piss!

Thou art henceforth banished to the Cuck Chair! Begone with thee!

Severance Snape.

Bread Bread Breademption

Me to my wife after she rips some majorly gnarly farts

Saw an acting professor of mine show up in I Think You Should Leave! That’s the sign of a good acting professor!

Marvel Rivals Ultimate Lines:

THE MOOOOON HAUNTS YOUUU

IT’S TIME TO PUT ON A SHOW

PURRREEEE CHAAAOOOOSSSSS

I AAMMMM GROOOOOT

JUDGE, JURY, EXECUTIONEERRRRR

YOUR POWERS ARE MINE

NOW THIS IS REAL FIREPOWER

IT’S MORBIN’ TIME

GAWRSH, I’M GONNA GOOF YOU UP

The world is a Frankenstein.

I bet people with aerophobia are feeling PRETTY smug nowadays!

Just once I want someone to look at me and say “HUMMINA HUMMINA HUMMINA, AWOOOOOGA!” 😔

Maybe I wasn’t clear about this. I wanted more egg and no plane crash, not many plane crash and no egg.

I just ate a bunch of Sweet Tart gummies really fast. The gods will punish me for my hubris 😔

Checking out this movie that apparently predicted the danger of using any American airline under the second Trump administration!

hakeem jeffries' wife packing up to go stay at her parents because she asked him to wash the dishes and he stood in front of the sink throwing his hands in the air and saying "what can i do, the water isn't even on"

ACAB includes Dog Man. Sorry, he’s gotta go up against the wall too. Them’s the breaks!

Flibbertigibbet-ass motherfucker

Dang, the pall bearer group chat is really poppin off