Aye 😉

I fell for a psyop I saw on TV that convinced me to eat a cheeseburger

The smart phone killed the hobby

Freud: you are a slave to your unconscious impulses.
Mrs Freud: really?
Freud: All your dreams are about penises.
Mrs Freud: OK...
Freud: My ego is fucking super and I WANT TO FUCK MY MOTHER!
Mrs Freud: *takes away his cocaine*

I never knew what to do with my hands in photographs until I discovered how cool I look doing karate.

I knew you would understand

😂

Hugely suspicious that the only bird that ever quothed was the raven. Why has a penguin never quoth?

I didn't lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

I didn't lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

I run a parody bank account.

Which is your country?

I'm not watching the news any more. It's not because it's scary or depressing or anything like that.
I just find it all so depressingly stupid.

Aren't hipsters just repackaged nerds?

I have a bottomless boat full of troubles.

Though the first and most pressing of those troubles is my boat has no bottom.

Much to ponder

Good article reminded me a bit of the idea of parkinsons law of triviality (or bikeshedding)

ChatGPT been completely no help in coming up with ideas about how best to redecorate this haunted whale corpse.

He does seem to be on some kind of journey, in a direction not often travelled in this day and age

I'm just one decent laminator away from owning a very convincing licence to kill.

😘

I'm glad to finally have made a permanent mark on the world 😘

I flirted with disaster and now I'm married.

Though we all kinda know, it's impossible to define exactly what gist means.

Me *lowering pizza into the freezer* "I love you."
Pizza "I know."

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has now achieved the impressive accolade of becoming the first ever presenter of Channel 4's Alternative Christmas Message to have been taken out by an Israeli airstrike.

I only use balsamic vinegar made from the finest of ballsams.

Counterpoint: if it's a toss up, I (a left leaning voter) may as well vote green to give Labour a kicking

"Question everything!"
"Why?"