Is it possible that people just like exercising outside?

My king, Duc Phuc 👑

Add “Kragystan” to numerous “Kazakhastans”

We’re going to Saudi Arabia in 2026!

(But that doesn’t mean they won)

And now we wait for the jury to render their verdict.

The contestant from Uzbekistan brought his mom, and he seems very nice.

Okay, Vietnam was fire. Give this guy the trophy now.

Ladies and gentleman, Slobodan Trkulja of Serbia.

Oh, and they gave the artist from Qatar a balalaika.

The irony of playing a song called “La Fiesta de la Paz” in Moscow.

Big performance from Denise and D-Lain from Madagascar! Honestly. They were good.

He’s so humble. What a guy. And the camera cuts away just as he’s about to kiss Mizulina. Our loss.

I spoke to soon. He asked the jury not to judge his performance. “I’m representing Russia, and Russia has already won. We won because everyone is here as our guest.”

And then he screamed “I’m Russian,” a line from his hit “I’m Russian.”

Wow, Shaman with a big performance! The Russian artist, who is also the only artist who has gotten to address the crowd directly, might just win this thing.

Correspondents, interviewing Wang Xi: You like Russia?

Wang Xi: I like Russia.

Hard-hitting stuff.

I’m pretty sure the host has said “Kazakhastan” twice now. Oof.

Vassy, the American contestant, who was born in Australia and only announced on Wednesday to replace a different American contestant, apparently had to pull out due to pressure from the Australian government, according to the show’s hosts.

China is the early favorite for me. Classic Eurovision style ballad from Wang Xi.

Lavrov in the house!

And Russia, obviously.

We’ve got dancing holograms!

Fuck it, I’m going to intermittently live tweet Intervision. Putin filmed a very serious address specifically for the event! I bet the contestants feel special!

Shockingly, it didn’t fit the attempt at camp happening on the stage.

I was already a Five Elephant stan, but this really sealed the deal.

I mean…

Where Do Berlin’s Club Kids Go When They Grow Up? La Maison for a Croissant.

There’s a lot going on here that reinforces my general dislike of La Maison that started after a former employee told me about working there.

I will admit some of their pastries are decent though.

Spurs 🥺

Surely this time. Surely...

This would be a huge blow to independent media in the Caucasus.

Fingers crossed 🤞🏻