i know my shit is bad because for the last four years my therapist has concluded our last session of the year, right before the festive break and her sorely deserved holiday period, by telling me i can get in touch with her on her damn break if i need to (i would absolutely never do this dw)
depression so bad i got 8 inches off my hair and now my mate and i have coined a new cut
today: 10am sister’s masters graduation, 2pm meet at dad’s house to have our 14-y-o family dog put down, 5pm drive to cemetery for our dead mum’s birthday. tmrw is dad’s oncological review at which we anticipate bad news. idk man i can’t keep living like this. like lol but also. it ain’t good
chronic sinus problems are so dumb. yeah what if every time you get a minor cold or seasonal allergy your face swells and you get a headache so bad you’re constantly nauseous and sometimes your eardrum just perforates spontaneously. also you get a cough that lasts for weeks. nothing fixes it btw
once every two years i have to try a milk coffee because im tempted by the devil and then reliably i remember i fucking hate that shit and have been lactose intolerant since birth. it doesn’t matter if it’s oat milk it’s still foul to me. but i keep trying
photos from my trail run today :-)
the amount of free piss i get on account of having a stunningly gorgeous stumpy-legged rescue labrador with the temperament of a stoned middle-aged bass player is crazy
a new bar has opened in marysville which is huge + i do want to support it but my loyalty is to the town’s only pub where i can walk in wearing bike shorts, a parka and hiking shoes, sit with my laptop knocking out a freelance job, and an old-timer will inevitably buy me a wine bc he loves marth
sorry for party rocking (being mentally ill on substack once again) open.substack.com/pub/jennifer...
snake is actually a cunt ass sequence and on a good day i like it a lot….feels good to stretch out that side body. on a bad day however im lucky not to eat shit and am reminded of my feeble abdominal muscles
finishing a reformer class with snake, walking home in the pouring rain before preparing for my first therapy session in five weeks……oh i just KNOW im about to have a deranged snotty hiccuping sob in the next 12 hours
tongue ❤️
you’re right and i love the west!!! but if im here for work im usually in or near the CBD :( and rn im tourguiding family around the Big Sights :( c’est la vie
i also had an excellent and very charming meal last night to be fair. i just come here once a year and remember how this city’s pub culture is absolutely Of Hell
sydney is crazy bc you can go from a truly transcendant view of a sunset pink-tinted opera house or swim at a STUNNING surf beach right in the city. then you walk into an average/safe-looking pub and have the worst counter meal of your life surrounded by men wearing chinos with loafers and no socks
this man once did a beer bong with wine. whenever he sees girls scheming he says “man, i LOVE witches” with utter reverence. he refuses to use streaming services. when he wants to compliment me he says “jenn, you’re a fuckin MATRIARCH. we love you” there’s no challenge to which he will not rise
my sis took our visiting american fam to drag bingo last night and the queen hosting, on learning they were from the US, asked them to say ‘cunt’ thinking they’d be uncomfortable. joke’s on them because dave (6’3” stoner, bass player and retired special ed teacher) immediately intoned “CUNT”
last night we were at the same function and ended up seated at opposite ends of the table and at the end of the evening she hugged me outside the pub and said “we didn’t even get to talk!” and another mate said “oh we could have swapped seats!” and tasha was like “it’s fine we’re securely attached”
jk i love her so much and it was up there with top 5 sweetest/most deranged things she’s ever said to me along with “im scared your therapist is going to tell you to stop hanging out with me” (à propos of literally nothing) and “ferrante’s lila makes me think of you”
my bestie and i walking our dogs along the river and she asks me for my residency dates so she can put them in her ical and then she puts her phone away, turns to me and says, with tears in her eyes, “i think im gonna be a lot happier next year when you’re home more”. the theatrics on this bitch
round-up of best dad messages from this week. personal highlights for me include him asking me whether he has cornstarch in his house (???) + him separating the art and the artist (snoop) in a g chat w our minnesotan fam, who are currently visiting
‘miserly’ is a very apt word. i skimmed a few reviews yesterday and their tone was so arch and superior. what must it be like to make wild declarative statements with unearned confidence! ! !
i guess im just thinkin about the oft-espoused notion that reading engenders empathy and how there truly is uh. no hope for us. anyways!
i don’t know this person from a bag of beans btw; i only became aware of her when seated in front of her, as she loudly introduced herself by first name to another audience member. later i checked out a few of her reviews and promptly forgot about the blog thereafter
does a blog qualify as criticism? idk but what i will tell you is that it’s dire out there in auslit
same lady has positively reviewed the recent essay collection centring perspectives of jewish women post-october 7 2023 despite only having read the first two pieces contained therein. readers of her blog shouldn’t presume to know her opinion on ‘the situation in the middle east’ lol
thinkin about a certain traditional blog-based book reviewer with a decent if homogenous following, in front of whom i once sat in the audience of a regional lit festival, and who loudly declared ‘i don’t read books about drug addicts’
martha was sick of everyone’s nonsense and ready for BED
And to you x
standing naked in the bathroom using my ironing board as a standing desk, filling out a visa application on my laptop while i wait for my (head) conditioning treatment and (bush) hair removal cream to take effect…..has anyone ever multitasked quite like this? i sincerely doubt it x