There’s mad queues outside a frozen yoghurt place in Headingley and it very much feels like the premise for an episode of Seinfeld.

Been buggering around with these this arvo

Welcome to the sunlit uplands of self-actualisation

Go on then - we’ll give the egg campaign another shake, seeing how the weather’s set fair

Desperate times and all that…

Brutal how the Magnum made the Feast obsolete overnight. No fanfare, no ceremony, just bang - sorry son, but it’s over.

World War IV’s a bit of a mouthful innit?

Send some our way plz!

Every decade or so we have a serious chance of trams and every decade we get denied.

Never complain. Never explain.

I wouldn’t know anything about that sort of thing

Poor lambs - no-one deserves to be tragoed!

I have turned into an anthropomorphic Honda Jazz.

Just seen my first swallow of the year here in Leeds - a week earlier than last year.

THIS HAD BETTER MEAN IT’S GOING TO BE A GOOD BLOODY SUMMER

Ok, I caved. Currently macrodosing on microtones.

Concept album where every track is a review of another band’s concept album.

Am currently Angine de Poitrining now

The band but thanks for your concern

I have not Angine de Poitrined yet but the internet is very insistent that I should be Angine de Poitrining.

However, once in power the CCP realised that all the cool animals - dragons, tigers, that sort of thing - were all massively associated with the previous imperial regime and they needed a new animal to personify the new China. Step up, Pandaface - it’s your time to shine, pal!

I’ve been on a mad China tip of late and have a cool panda factoid for you:

Prior to the communist takeover, no-one gave a shit about pandas. They were totally irrelevant as animals go. Zero unread messages in the panda inbox.

MY KINGDOM FOR A TRAM

Pretty sure that about 37.467% of the internet is now just this guy quoting mad bastards saying mad bastard stuff

I mean there’s a lot to choose from rn

They’ve not lied to me yet

Amyone else get the feeling that art is not handling reality very well these days? Like, every target is moving too fast and too randomly to ever draw a bead on?

“Well I DOUBLE BLOCKADE you!!!”

Dwell on it a bit

Just realised that the double bass lick off Roni Size’s Brown Paper Bag is pretty much the start of Slayer’s Raining Blood guitar riff.

If you can smell this pic then I’m afraid the police are on the way over to confiscate all your Bad Religion records