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Built from years on the frontlines — ops, HR, Activity Director, HIV case management, Community Health Worker, and human rights training. Survived DV and burnout, now fixing the systems that cause it.

Same

Good Morning, Cousins.

SO... I say all of this to say...

if you have come across me or anything that i might have posted on here...know that feeling that you get about me is probably right.

I have no sense and i am really weird.

But i like it over here.

I started my journey on want ing to figure out why my brain was different.

The more i learned the more i wanted to learn about the Black experience.

Masking is our favorite thing to do as a neurodivergent person.

But like all mental health we show up differently. it effects us differently.

It had to happened. I needed to wake up

Having all of these issues i new somehow i was different...Not like the others.

I was really great at math, science, tech.

but i love learning anything. Even til this day

I would find joy in things being a particular way

certain textures make me physically sick...like mashed potatoes

When I was getting abuse i would be found at the school, library, or back of my closet banging myself on my head.

Crazy shit

It never dawn on me to talk about it.

Because for me...I DID say something.

3 times. No change.

I knew for sure the tv being thrown at her would definitely shut her up.

I remember having an argument with one of my sisters.

I was about 8/9.

My sister was always irritating to me. She always did too much.

A "normal" person: probably argue, maybe fist fight.

Me: I throw a whole tv at her.

No warning.

Why: I told her to leave me alone.

I still stand on this

I have tried reminders but the noise is over stimulating. Loud notifications sounds over stims me.

Learning that i am neurodivergent makes so much sense to me.

Like i have always thought i was different.

Music being my blankie

being very violent when i was over stimmed

In my relationships one of the biggest arguments i would have would be the amount that I actually ate, and what i actually ate in a day...or two.

I barely think about eating.

Having ADHD I already forget to eat but being on the meds...side effect: lack of appetite.

SO, on top on not remembering to eat, my meds removes it all together.

Also, I went to my truck, smoked, and now back at my desk.

I wanted to have a say in what was going to be taught to the incoming, current, etc from what i learned, wished i was taught, prepared, etc.

But i did it in TWO WEEKS.

for me this is really nothing. Just another Tuesday.

Thank you Neurodivergence & ADHD

I literally created my curriculum for accreditation in TWO WEEKS because i had a vision of where i wanted to see my life after divorce and i built a curriculum that i would want to have.

Learning, etiquette, luxury, prestigious, Black.

i recently found out that i am severely anemic and have extremely low Vitamin D.

This makes sense if you knew my real life.

I barely eat, hyper focus on goals, making money, etc.

On a handful of mental health meds that i actually can say that i need...You're welcome

No one prepared me for taking iron and Vitamin D pills

My stomach was not ready

Absolutely heard you

I want to go to my truck and smoke my blunt

Thoughts

I have been have the most painful cramps all day

@seanpadilla.blacksky.app

Hey Cousins,

I am at work on my overnight shift

Hopefully soon i can back to my regular posting

I want to do content on my journey but people watching would judge and i dont have that fight in me right now

I cried for a bit

But have to get back to figuring it out

I was able to pay for a storage but it took from my funds.

Now moving truck, place to stay, (battery/starter) for car