i was talking to shug on our morning walk, as you do, and we passed two hasids walking to morning minyan, and one said to the other in yiddish ‘the goyim talk to dogs like the rebbe talks to god.’ and look i’m not a goy and fuck you for entertaining the thought. however i must grudgingly admit: bars
"In the streets, in the schools, in the Signal threads, in all our places of healing and justice, we are as locusts."
A dvar Torah from occupied Minneapolis by Joey Glick:
A white portal on a black background. It has a gate of branches in the doorway. The branches have leaves and dots. Down the middle it says “gam zeh ya’avor.” Text at the bottom says “@maimonides_nutz”
Wishing you all a sweet secular new year 💛
your crazy ass stupid post just fucked up the whole world . hope it was worth the likes. hope youre enjoying the clicks
They cant get my data if i am Fully Dissolved in a bath tub full of sodium hydroxide
Screenshot of text
as Chanukah approaches I returned to something I wrote about the menorah and the difficulty of Jewish identity for the @jewishcurrents.bsky.social behaalotecha dvar torah
jewishcurrents.org/parshah/june...
(solemnly turns to camera) every day, sixteen thousand bangers don't make it because people are too far from their phones. don't be a statistic. never log off
please stop suggesting I solve my problem by changing my behavior. I do not want to do that
THAT is the appropriate response
I do feel bad for people who have to call snow days. no matter what half the response is like "I'm going to sue you when the terror happens to me" and the other half is like "in my day I dog sledded to school in 12 ft of snow. this is why kids these days have learning disabilities"
tried to post a picture and this website just refuses to allow me to do so, I guess, but tonight we had the annual chanukah narrowly avoided fire emergency when the match flew across the room, lit, and landed on C's body pillow. and thankfully not a cat.
we really did go off with latkes. and the general concept of a holiday celebrating oil
Your friends only like you because you are a singular, irreplaceable light in their lives and the fabric of their existence would be diminished without you in it
dbsjdkdhdhd well that's not MY fault
A menorah with a floral design with the shamash and furthest right candle lit. The candles are rainbow.
happy chanukah, everyone!
Bald Man Presses Face To Window As Thick-Haired Family Sits Down To Dinner -The Onion
Bald Man Presses Face To Window As Thick-Haired Family Sits Down To Dinner
theonion.com/bald-man-pre...
kinda mad these are so good when they're for WORK but also I'm stoned so I could have a higher opinion of them than the average man at this moment
made some early latkes for a party at work and I'm absolutely hulking out. I'm a simple man. I fucking love fried potatoes
Kabbalist 1: we should talk about the significance of this word here
Kabbalist 2: what? that doesn't mean anything?
Kabbalist 1: yeah but when you convert it to gematria and then turn it upside down, it spells boobies
Kabbalist 2: nice
Kabbalist 1: nice
🫡 we'll see if that works...next time
every time I try to use alt text the post won't go through and says the pic can't upload? not sure what to do about that
not my omeprazole in pride of place with the shabbos candles
weird shape maker
People have been so happy on social media the past few days I think it might be the first time UnitedHealthcare has ever helped with mental health
a child just asked me "what's the name of the girl with the long skin?" and when I said I did not know who she meant she said "oh yeah, it's okay, you can call her whatever you want." I'm frightened
a cloak believed to belong to the shooter transformed into a dozen beautiful white doves and flew away, Authorities said,
realistic like dracula
the only redeeming factor of the mensch on a bench is that I get to look at kids sitting down thoughtfully and think "the mensch on a bench." former coworker probably doesn't remember this
once one of my coworkers looked over at a very quiet, sweet, thoughtful kid (he liked to organize the bookshelves to calm down) who was at that moment sitting serenely on a bench instead of playing and said "the mensch on a bench..." and this has become such a thing I think to myself about children