Steamed Hams full transcript Well, Seymour, I made it- despite your directions. Ah. Superintendent Chalmers. Welcome. - I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon. - Yeah. Oh, egads! My roast is ruined. But what if I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Delightfully devilish, Seymour. Ah- Skinner with his crazy explanations The superintendent's gonna need his medication When he hears Skinner's lame exaggerations There'll be trouble in town tonight Seymour! Superintendent, I was just- uh, just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise. Care to join me? Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour? Uh- Oh. That isn't smoke. It's steam. Steam from the steamed clams we're having. Mmm. Steamed clams. Whew. Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers. I thought we were having steamed clams. D'oh, no. I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers. You call hamburgers steamed hams? Yes. It's a regional dialect. - Uh-huh. Uh, what region? - Uh, upstate New York. Really. Well, I'm from Utica, and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams. " Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression. I see. You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger. Oh, no. Patented Skinner burgers. Old family recipe. - For steamed hams. - Yes. Yes. And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled. Ye- You know, the- One thing I should- - Excuse me for one second. - Of course. Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped. Yes. I should be- Good Lord! What is happening in there? - Aurora borealis. - Uh- Aurora borealis at this time of year at this time of day in this part of the country localized entirely within your kitchen? - Yes. - May I see it? No. Seymour. ! The house is on fire. ! No, Mother. It's just the northern lights. Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow but I must say you steam a good ham.

Today is officially the 30th anniversary of Steamed Hams. On April 14, 1996, "22 Short Films About Springfield" aired for the first time!

wow! Rand Paul begins Markwayne Mullin's hearing by confronting him about comments he made describing Paul as a "freakin' snake" & "celebrating" Paul getting assaulted

"I wonder if someone who applauds political violence is right to lead an agency that has struggled to accept proper use of force"

theonion.com/no-blood-for...

SHOULD THE U.S BLOT OUT THE SUN AND USHER IN AN AGE OF ETERNAL DARKNESS? - Gallup 2/20/26-3/5/26

NO - 41%
YES - 38%
UNSURE - 21%

For years on my old blog I published the names of servicemembers who died in Iraq & Afghanistan. No other outlets were.

These are the first 4 Americans to die in the Iran War.
Capt. Cody A. Khork, 35
Sgt. 1st Class Noah L. Tietjens, 42
Sgt. 1st Class Nicole M. Amor, 39
Sgt. Declan J. Coady, 20

Movie description of the B horror move Death PhD. Gawdawful movie.

Now this is a movie plot!!! Someone understands grad school.

Same. Also a former Herndon Hornet about a hundred years ago.

My father and mother, Mark Hortman and Melissa Hortman, and their dog Gilbert, were killed by a man who believed conspiracy theories and fake news. Words matter. Sharing fake news is dangerous. One part of my grief journey has been understanding the last conversation with my mother. She loved her job. People respected her job and what she did at her job. When I called her after the legislative session ended, I asked why she voted for the bill mentioned in the video shared by President Trump, and she wept. That bill and her vote had nothing to do with fraud. She voted for that bill because it was the only way to avoid a government shutdown. She had seen the impact of shutdowns: people lose their health care, their jobs, and in some cases, from a story she told me, have taken their own lives. She was in a very tough position on that vote. She had never really voted against her conscience like that. It was emotional and extremely difficult. Her struggle with that vote makes this conspiracy all the more painful for me. I am asking President Trump to remove the video that he shared and apologize to me and my family for posting this misinformation and for using my mother's own words to dishonor her memory.

My sister Sophia Hortman (Sophie) asked me to share this on her behalf, she is off social media: "The video shared by President Donald Trump on Truth Social is a painful, false twisting of my mother's final vote. The vote she made was incredibly difficult for my mother; it was not a vote made lightly or with malice in her heart. She made the decision to prevent a government shutdown because she believed our great state protects and helps Minnesotans. We must create a society in which we do not harbor hatred and violence toward our political opponents, and this video promotes a false narrative which fuels the flames of political division. The video being shared by the president is another hurdle our family must overcome in grieving the loss of my parents, Mark and Melissa, and their beloved Gilbert. I ask President Trump to please consider the pain and sadness we have faced, and to honor the spirit of the holidays we have just spent without our parents by taking down the post on Truth Social." Please share our message and help us ask the President to take this down.

Colin and Sophie Hortman, the children of Minnesota state Rep. Melissa Hortman and her husband, Mark, are asking Trump to remove the false posts about their parents' killing:

Hoosiers are 1-0 under Mayor Mamdani

Go Army! Beat Navy!

Fine. Okay. I'll coach Penn State.

Handing back student work that’s been written by ChatGPT with a 0 followed by the comment “This essay will never stand in authentic wonder before the Beauty of God’s creation.”

God has let Bolsonaro slip the icy cold grip of death time and time again just so this moment can happen

We’re allowed to have one.

X Post by Michael Adams, Kentucky Secretary of State: "We’re getting calls about polls being closed. They are closed because we do not have elections today. Kentucky votes next year. You cannot vote today in Kentucky for the mayor of New York City or the Governor of Virginia. Sorry."

What happens when you distill 2025 into a single social media post?

This.

This is what you get.

Every time I’m about to just give up hope, someone gives me a new reason to believe. The children once again lead the way.

Best Gameday sign I’ve seen so far today:

“Vandy beat my mom’s cancer”

Listen, Vandy. When Biff asks, you are out!

As an alum, this nonsense is the most Vandy thing ever.

Thomas Paine's "American Crisis" note on the 'summer soldier and the sunshine patriot'

So celestial an article...

Another Tigers fan (former WA resident) fully on board with the M’s. Typically this is the kiss of death so apologies in advance. And Go Cougs!

I do…what I feel like.

For the zillionth time, they called this thing PALANTIR and just like it says on the tin it is an evil thing created by an evil being and has driven its possessors insane

Two NYT headlines stating the WH wants to promote more childbearing and the EPA is ending testing for chemicals that hurt children.

Two headlines in the New York Times today.

The most obvious lesson to draw from the leaked Signal chat is that these people really are morons. It's not a public act, it's not a schtick, there's not some secret back room where they drop the facade. They are genuinely stupid, incompetent people.

My students in Texas warned me of the power of Buc-ee’s. That’s why I picked CSU in my bracket.

Pac-12 Football is BACK

Paywall, but you can get the gist.

Interesting local story after a recent Vance visit to the area.