It’s the Playoffs. Let Gritty have a gun.

ok fine
i will manage the mets

ADOBE: welcome to photoshop. what would you like to do. here is an AI tool
ME: i would like to draw a rectangle. i am selecting the rectangle tool
ADOBE: did you say AI?
ME: rectangle please
ADOBE: sorry but i can only do that in an insane way now. here is a new layer and a vector for some reason

this morning, mamdani’s team got in touch with me to float a new tax proposal: if your net worth exceeds $5 million and you dress badly, you’ll be hit with a 10% annual levy for “visual pollution.” i would be in charge of deciding if the outfits are bad.

President, Extremely Normal Brain-Wise: Pope Weak on Crime, Also I’m Dr. Jesus Christ

A+ headline.

defector.com/president-ex...

NYT: Trump Maintains That U.S. Has Ample Weapons as Iran War Depletes Stocks

My "We are not running low on munitions" T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.

a lot of nissan altima energy in this administration

Go birds

This Seahawks defensive effort, while amazing, still doesnt touch the Eagles last year because the Patriots, in fact, are not good.

Back to back brutal Super Bowls for Drakes

No Kings includes Draft Kings

I'm sorry the guy changing the rules on the fly is named what

fraggle rock implies the existence of fraggle jazz and fraggle rap

nintendo is going to drone strike the data center responsible for this

The only president to keep the Patriots out of the Super Bowl this century? Joe Biden

another robot highlight for 2025: man wearing humanoid mocap suit kicks himself in the balls

You're down 10-6, and missed a makeable FG. You come back to the locker room for the big rally to get the second half going. However you can't see coach because there's a giant inflatable bunny in the locker room. You are a professional football player. #Eagles

this is the Pope

his entire thing is going around waving to crowds and looking happy

he is also such a White Sox fan that this is the maddest - and most human - I have ever a pope look

RFK Jr. Mandates All Americans Drink Mysterious Glowing Liquid WASHINGTON—Claiming the luminous potion would make the nation strong and vigorous, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. issued an order Friday directing all Americans to drink a m...

RFK Jr. Mandates All Americans Drink Mysterious Glowing Liquid

slurpee machine with one crashed screen

I'm drinking the Bios Crash slurpee I hope it crashes my bios I hope I blue screen

"Jeff Epstein" - Jim Downey on Conan YouTube video by Box Chat

I know everyone's seen this but I just saw it again and I think it's the funniest thing ever recorded on a podcast youtu.be/GKfHcas_cZg?...

Cannot stress enough that, as a kid growing up in the late-80s and early 90s, this was presented as a foundational American value.

punting on 2nd and 3 at the opponent’s 20 is something we will never ever see in football, because if a coach was trying to throw a game there are many more subtle ways of doing so. this is probably the closest thing to that we’re likely to see

Supreme Court Rules 6-3 To Open Evil Tomb Of Batibat WASHINGTON—Despite polls that show the American public overwhelmingly supports keeping the ancient burial chamber sealed, the Supreme Court ruled 6-3 Friday to pry open the evil tomb of Batibat, a ven...

Supreme Court Rules 6-3 To Open Evil Tomb Of Batibat

these people think you're stupid and hold you in absolute fucking contempt

Lord, I've seen what you've done for other cities

at least he didn't do something truly reckless like try to forgive student loans

kitten standing up staring at the camera. their head is being focused on so the pic looks weird

i’m committing acts