…and tired of getting over her… 😢

I’m sure limerence has a lot to with how I feel about Maddie.

Thing is, she still has never said or done a shitty to me, and that’s valuable, but all the others have.

It would be so much easier if she was just bitchy to me like all the others have been.

Tired of being everyone’s second choice…

Ohh, definitely mid-2000s you in there!

So tired of this headspace…

Immensely frustrated and lonely tonight…

Struggle Street There is just too much distance in my life at the moment, and my head is in a lot of different places.

Struggle Street - https://this-heart.com/s/6sgoe6pt #thisheart

Live Moment: Calmer Waters and Red High Heels I have deliberately not written here for a little while, for just over two months in fact.

Live Moment: Calmer Waters and Red High Heels - https://this-heart.com/s/scSzPV9X #thisheart

Strong chance, I’ll see where my head lands on this one. Lots of factors to consider.

Yes, and I didn’t say I didn’t understand… 😏

Glad you got through that. I don’t have trouble with Ubers, but women I’m sure get lots more unwanted attention.

I’ve been thinking about moving back to Victoria for a while. My company says they wouldn’t have a problem with me relocating to the Melbourne office.

I think I’m going to do it. Just need to sleep on it a bit before I ultimately decide.

It’ll be nice to be close to family again.

She’s gotten off now, and I’m sad. It was a little smile in my day.

I’m on the way home on a train, and there’s a girl a few rows in front of me who looks so much like Maddie. She’s wearing sunglasses, but otherwise could be her twin.

Hard to see.

Comfortable Places Christmas 2025 has been an interesting vibe in my head.

Comfortable Places - https://this-heart.com/s/m3Myf0Qx #thisheart

Struggling with the universe today. And I don’t like hot days. Moving home to Melbourne has its appeal.

Live Moment: Silent Heart It has been some weeks since I have written.

Live Moment: Silent Heart - https://this-heart.com/s/NWsdhlr0 #thisheart

Thank you, friend…and you’re right, she really is fabulous…

Oceans Truly Apart I've spoken previously about how Richard Marx's Right Here Waiting is one of the two main songs in my heart for Maddie, and how I felt it related to us.

Oceans Truly Apart - https://this-heart.com/s/4TsJtrxs #thisheart

A Limerent Question It has been a little while since I have written, but I am in a place right now where I need to look inwards toward myself.

A Limerent Question - https://this-heart.com/s/zs3licGR #thisheart

Emotional Dilemma I've been wondering the last couple of weeks whether or not it would be a good idea to just take some time off work, jump on a plane to London and surprise Maddie for her birthday next month.

Emotional Dilemma - https://this-heart.com/s/LfwRhm9H #thisheart

Seriously considering taking some time off work to fly to London to visit Maddie for her birthday next month.

Romantic? Sure.

Good idea? Doubt it.

But I’m still thinking about it.

Live Moment: Those Blue Eyes As I write this live moment tonight, I'm starting to feel a little better about things.

Live Moment: Those Blue Eyes - https://this-heart.com/s/D5gg7Awz #thisheart

I’m in a really shitty space this morning. Deeply craving a little bit of intimacy. It’s all too hard at the moment.

Lost In Conversation It has just gone 8pm in Eastern Australia, and just past 11am in London.

Lost In Conversation - https://this-heart.com/s/N99av5Tn #thisheart

Moment In Time: The Trees Vibrated I posted some time ago about the two songs that mean the most to me when it comes to Maddie - two songs that touched me deeply in the times they were released, and related closely to how I felt about Maddie at the time.

Moment In Time: The Trees Vibrated - https://this-heart.com/s/osvLkYDN #thisheart

Musical Moment #9 - Not A Day Goes By It's been a while since I've dropped a Musical Moment into this blog - and with Maddie having recently left for London, and the subsequent struggle I've been going through, music has been a bit of a light in the darkness.

Musical Moment #9 - Not A Day Goes By - https://this-heart.com/s/UJuM7Z3p #thisheart

But I have made an appointment to see a psychologist. It's a new one, my previous one is no longer practicing, so I have anxiety that I need to learn a new person.

I just need to talk, and find a perspective.

I have two more years of this to get through.

I can't imagine how complicated it would be to move to the other side of the world. More intense than my anxiety would be able to deal with.

I am not doing great.

It's silly, because I'm not with Maddie, but now that she's so far away, and I can't just reach out to her, I've never felt so lonely.

We've not really communicated too much since she left, she's just super busy getting set up in London.

Men and women just need to start giving each other a chance again.

And learn to be kind to each other…