Hey everybody! I am taking the helm of this classic American institution with @theonion.com and want to know what you fine folks would like to see from us.

Join The Onion Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.

For fuck's sake, sign up for The Onion, and get a free limited edition IW tote.

A share of merch sales will go to the Sandy Hook families, which will be the first time they get any money since they filed this lawsuit eight years ago.

Legal fees have been insane. Please sign up and help us out!

With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.

We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.

Please stand by for more.

The Onion Has a New Plan to Take Over Infowars

Here's how we're taking over InfoWars.

The Infowars news is funny, yes. But more importantly, it is an outright rebuke of Alex Jones' evil.

It's testament to the strength and resilience of the Sandy Hook families who survived this bullshit for more than a decade as well as the Onion, which didn't give up on this for the last 18 months.

The Onion has successfully bought InfoWars. Happy 4/20. 😂

LET’S GO BLUE!!! #michiganbasketball #wolverines

Luxembourg becomes second country worldwide to enshrine abortion rights in constitution Large majority in parliament backs amendment to Luxembourg’s highest law, with ‘freedom’ to have an abortion added to constitution

🇱🇺Luxembourg has enshrined abortion rights in its constitution, the second country, after France, to do so.

Facts spoken by an ex-trumper...

There has been white nationalist/Nazi content floating around in US political culture since the 1940s. What’s changed is that Trump’s GOP has become an institutional engine for amplifying and normalizing such garbage.

Newly Obtained Video of Minneapolis Shooting Undermines ICE Account

Remember when DHS agents had no choice but to shoot two Venezuelan men because the men had attacked them with a snow shovel and a broomstick?

New video shows they were lying about that one, too.

www.nytimes.com/2026/04/06/u...

Legacy media paints Harmeet Dhillon as plucky underdog fighting ‘woke ideology’ To the legacy media, Harmeet Dhillon has spent her career as an underdog — bravely swimming against the liberal tide.

To understand the deep institutional failure of legacy media in protecting democracy, please read this. Then share it. www.democracydocket.com/analysis/leg...

No one is coming to save us - it's up to us to save each other. To feed each other. To support each other. To be kind to each other. To lift up those that need help. What can you do to help now?

Great read that should be shared widely -

hachyderm.io/@inthehands/...

Trump has called on Congress to pass a record $1.5T defense budget.

Roughly half of defense spending goes to private contractors that routinely price-gouge the government.

Meanwhile, the Pentagon has failed EIGHT straight audits.

The military industrial complex is cheering right now.

Hey media--

Pam Bondi is not a victim -- she willingly carried out Trump's political agenda to prosecute his political enemies and undermine free and fair elections.

Todd Blache is not shouldering a "burden" or "walking a tightrope." He is a willing accomplice.

Language matters.

My favorite from "No Kings" in Denver.

It’s always hard to say no to your supervisor.

The President of the United States is a war criminal.

Fact, not opinion.

Humpback whales perform an incredible bubble feeding spectacle right in front of a lodge in Canada. Witnessing this behavior is a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

We need to know how much energy data centers use – and if YOU are subsidizing the costs of Big Tech companies.

Making this data public is the bare minimum.

Walz: The president said it's a bunch of radicals. You're damn right we've been radicalized. Radicalized by compassion, radicalized by decency, radicalized by due process, radicalized by democracy.

🚨 THIS JUST IN: With over 100 protests still to come, we can already estimate that at least 8 million people participated in No Kings protests today.

That makes No Kings 3 the largest single day of protest in American history. #NoKings

So what’s next after today’s historic No Kings Day protests?

We’re glad you asked: nokings.org/whats-next #NoKings

Nope Nope

#NoKings
#Michigan

The party is on is Philadelphia where #NoKings protesters come energized with electronic music!

Holy sh*t!

San Diego is showing up for No Kings!

Massive protest!

🚨HUGE crowd at No Kings Chicago. "We can't even see the edge of the crowd!" -our @jtcestkowski.bsky.social reports. We're LIVE NOW. ⬇️