DYK the “dildo” was named after our lighthouse?

nah, I know who my people are, thanks

ameriKKKans might want to reconsider emigrating north

Sorry Folks. The Strait of Hormuz is Closed. The Lying Circus Monkey in the White House should have told you.

Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and taste…
*Jaggerbaums 2/13

I miss not having a cat try to kill me on the stairs every morning.

i saved this to remember, cut off some letters, now i forget 😬

curling season/shorts weather is a Venn diagram with the tiniest overlap
#CannabisSocks

@daisyvibes9.bsky.social

so, what happened in Cricklewood Green a decade ago?

wtf is this?

🇺🇸 “hold my mediocre beer.”

better watch out for quicksand now

wouldn’t that be FFPL?
what?

a gentleman is someone who knows how to play the didgeridoo, but he didgeridon’t.

Toronto hyperbole 🤦‍♂️

i will always buy the bagels in the bag with a cardboard closure - we’re the ones making a real difference in this godforsaken hellscape

This day in history. 2015. Florence Welch of Florence + The Machine broke her foot jumping off the stage at Coachella and for the next seven weeks of her tour had to be wheeled onstage strapped to a hand-cart like Hannibal Lecter.

This day in history. 2001. In a FIFA World Cup qualifying match Australia defeated American Samoa 31-0 with winger Archie Thompson scoring 13. What the hell, I'm sure he said, there's no Nobel prize for sportsmanship.

This day in history. 1887. Abraham Lincoln was buried again, one of seventeen burials before authorities finally covered his coffin with enough concrete (two tons) to keep him underground or is it?

how many pontiffs does it take to change a lightbulb?

everyone: glorious photo
me: omg that poor squirrel

hey look - a trail of slime that seems to spell “Trump is a Cunt”!

someone needs to make a list of the myriad things that never happened in #TwoWeeks
Bueller? anyone?

is there a meta Starbucks in Starbuck, MB? ’cause i would boycott that one, too

In order to be a bit more informed about soccer (football whatevs) before World Cup madness descends on Toronto this summer I need clarification - I know the players can’t touch the ball with their hands but can they carry it in their mouth like a dog? #worldcup2026