I do hope Forbidden Planet is on that list

Jesus. Twister in Donegal right now.

A photo of the front cover of issue 1641 of Private Eye magazine with the caption "ON SHELVES NOW!" The headline reads "DONALD TRUMP: AN APOLOGY." The cover features a mock statement claiming that, in contrast to past descriptions of Trump as "a sleazy, deranged, orange-faced man-baby," the magazine now recognises him as "a political colossus, the voice of sanity, a champion of liberty, and the saviour of the Western world." The parody humorously describes him as "slim, handsome, and young," concluding with a note that "this statement has not been fact-checked."

Donald Trump. An Apology.

The new Private Eye is out now

Many incredible people walked through the doors while I was working at DFID. Jimmy Carter was one I will never forget. At 92, he belted out a speech about how we can overcome neglected tropical diseases, highlighting the progress and what needed to be done next, and he inspired us all.

Evri asking me to rate their performance on parcel that's taking two weeks to travel 60 miles and still hasn't arrived
Google asking me to rate and review Christmas tree farm I haven't visited yet and probably won't

Community group congratulating themselves by re-posting local MP's own post about herself eating mince pies while congratulating herself on congratulating them
Royal Mail advertising how to return multiple Christmas presents which I haven't received yet

Signs that Christmas 2024 has entered a time loop on my social feeds: (all true)
Trailer for a program showing how to use up leftover panettone
which I haven't bought and am not going to

When you feel that cold hard wind, know your power, know your value, know your strength

love’s austere and lonely offices

Robert Hayden, ‘Those Winter Sundays’

I've just spotted the flaw in this excellent plan which is that now I have to go home and that means driving a mile up a very steep hill through a wood with the windspeed no lower than it was in the night. Wish me luck

Not just hunkering down - I've chickened out and am spending the night at the nearest pub. Time enough to survey the damage in the morning #StormDarragh #Cornwall

A column in which Gregg Wallace is described as emitting the vibe of a man in John Lewis linen department, shouting "You bitches think you're better than me! Well you're not! I'm the former presenter of 'Follow That Tomato' and I demand respect!"

This week's Celebrity Watch, on the Greggpocalypse. He is now DisasterChef: www.thetimes.com/life-style/c...

Obviously, The Dig

That's EXACTLY what I thought