Once you hit 40 you don't really need an alarm. Your problems will wake you up everyday right on time.

Now that I've fled Leon's site for bluer skies, I'm sure I'll be called an #Ex-X, but personally, I'll always consider myself a #TwitterQuitter.

Glorious set up!🤩

Per reporter Reese Gorman,

The attorney for the minor who Gaetz is accused of having sex with calls for the Ethics Committee to release their report on Gaetz.

“We would support the House Ethics Committee immediately releasing their report. She was a high school student and there were witnesses.”

Exactly, George. Turns out ‘merit’ was just code for fealty.

Join The Onion Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.

Subscribe to The Onion. Maybe we can buy Red Lobster next.

Immediate follow💙

Yes! Immediate follow💙

Thank you! So glad I joined the call. You’re so well spoken!

I'm so over calling on MAGA Reps to "do the right thing." The Dems on the ethics committee should leak the Gaetz report to press. Don't complain to us about the GOP - get the job done.

Hopefully this works…