Walking on Broken Glass, Sleeping Satellite, Baker Street.

Approximately one million years ago* (*1992) I worked in a coffee shop on a remote Scottish island where the only music was via wobbly radio reception of Atlantic 252 (long wave). They had a very limited playlist and certain songs make me involuntarily want to start mopping floors even today.

Horrible Histories Songs vs Originals | Series 1-5 Original Cast Seasons YouTube video by Rebecca Penn

My youngest is well into the original early few series of HH and enjoys the songs despite not knowing that they are pastiches of the Smiths or Madonna or whatever. Absolutely blew her mind showing her this youtu.be/pbgF1Vwg8nM?...

It's almost comical how spring sunshine affects my mood and ability to function.

I like to think I'm a complex meat sack but really, I'm just a plant. 🌱

I like the idea of saying “oi, can you lend us a puffin til payday?” except of course we largely live in a post-cash society. But not post-puffin yet, thankfully.

Those artists do sound like what I was playing in 2007… do you have the full list? I will dig, but my iTunes playlists are messily time machined somewhere…

I will politely decline an invitation to nibble on pickled dormice at that Roman era themed place though…

One of the great irritations of the modern age is people using computers with big landscape screens to create documents intended for people who mostly use mobiles with small, portrait screens. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Eg school newsletters/letters distributed by email. Trial by PDF.

How is this still a thing? 🤔

Too late! But another time ☎️ 👍

This was 2017?

Just Switch Off Your Television Set And Go Out And Do Something Less Boring Instead?

🙋🏻‍♀️

Giving the school bully your Geography GCSE in the hope that they pick you for their netball team next PE lesson. 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️

Genuinely went to visit La Rochelle a few years back after having it drummed into me for all those years that there was beaucoup à faire dans le week-end. Thought I might bump into Chantel and Pascal…

It was very unremarkable as places go. There was not much to do. They lied.

Morning inexplicably spoilt by Liquid Glass and its ugly little edges on app icons. Ugh. Give me back my solids and get out of the way.

One meal for the whole day, that.

Tray with a cooked breakfast, cup of tea and brown toast with butter

Ferry pier illuminated with streetlights, reflecting on the water below. In the sky above, purple light against the clouds signals that dawn is coming.

View of the vehicle gangway onto the Clansman CalMac ferry. The word Clansman is made of fairy lights threaded through the railings on the top deck.

View of Lismore lighthouse from the ferry. White-tipped waves in a grey blue sea, a rock promontory and a white lighthouse building. Misty hills in the distance.

Calmac breakfast is the best, when you’ve left the house before dawn and driven more than an hour across a dark island. Also, the twinkly lights were very cheery.

I love this but I was thinking of you when I did it and really hoping for:
- goat
- cute goat
- naughty goat
- grumpy goat
- angry rooster

Sorry, I temporarily lost my ability to count, apparently. Too distracted by thinking about starlings, perhaps.

Where’s number 5? Or was it 875 other starlings, as is usually the case…?

Introduce yourself with 5 animals you’ve seen in your back garden

- sparrow hawk
- fox
- pheasant
- bank vole
- green mamba (admittedly not in current North Yorkshire back garden)

Vole and Red Leicester is the best.

Today is a day when arts degrees are worthless, but the product of those degrees is so valuable it would kill an entire industry if they were made to pay for it.

Department of We’re The Best And Don’t You Forget It

Eft!

I dreamt last night that I wrote a fantastic (no really, it was amazing) song about being a smallholder. I woke up at one point and thought “I should really write this down” but then figured it was SO GOOD I would definitely remember it.

I do not remember it.

In the early 2000s the A4 flyover corridor into Hammersmith was particularly well known as being prime billboard territory…at least for convincing Sky and other media heads that their ad money was being spent influentially. (“We must be doing well; our ads are everywhere!”)

My teenager says this is a known thing people do 🤷🏻‍♀️

Have you visited Schuench? Great skiing. And nothing beats whale watching in Hactish Nonthwest.

Ah, i remember fondly my time in Hactish Nonthwest…