Great

fail Japan

i just rejected so many experiences so long im super worried its totally fucked up my mind. really really weird and i wish there was a test for this...maybe im overreacting but i kinda think there is something "up"

Never stay inside a comfort zone this is for sure one cure to a lot of these issues

Daily Psychological Torment

I’ve read man’s search for meaning and that’s a pretty good recognition of all these kinds of feelings / psychology I think

maybe this is all an overreaction. but its intense right now. i wish i was kinder to myself in the past because the consequences are insane

the world is collapsing around me and i have nothing inside me. i am less than an animal (dog, cat, etc) and i will be alone in my head forever because i never truly connected in the past. i thought the world in the past would be the world in the future and it isn't. whats going to happen to me?

its like in the past i was bottlenecking myself into future suicide and now im in that future and jesus. its even worse than i thought

i interpret every single post as made for “me specifically” and that gives me a sense of social recognition when i was like never a part of the equation. i have used that feeling maybe in ways, combined with other things, to cope with loneliness. but now i realize how alone i am, maybe emotionally…

i had no idea how socially atomized i was until now. it’s deeply concerning me when at one point maybe it gave me a sense of strength. i need real life people to connect to. almost all my connections the past decade have been on the internet only.

aw man i’m happy to hear. the fact that stuff reached anyone means a lot…i hope the best on your journey with games and art too! we are all in this together 💪

i let the negativity and self doubt take over me too early. i manifested my greatest fears. but can i still recover? i think so. the support is going away so i have to be realistic

i feel alright by doing this kind of “public journaling” . maybe even if nobody sees it. it’s just familiar and comforting.

yeah. i can take on the world now!

i have perpetuated a fantasy world in my head since like, 2018. and avoided all the things that didn’t validate it. that’s a long time. now that i see what the real world is, i feel unprepared.

but i can come through still. i want to strive for the greatest while knowing what “reality” is too.

…helps others, says what is on my mind (with respect of course if needed.) Doesn’t take take take from everyone. follows what i think is “true”

thank you all for reading if you got this far. it’s this kind of support that matters most right now, haha

i wonder if i have spent most of my teenage and adult life just lying to myself about so much. i don’t want to feel the bad things i’ve been feeling Today for the rest of my life. the world is set up in a way to prevent you from becoming crazy. im choosing to become someone now who….

to take a serious look at where things are for me, i don’t know…it is scary. i think i really am at the start of so much. i don’t want to be dependent on everyone to survive. hm. on something not real. like a perceived audience?

i need to prove to myself i can do something for a long time.

i let so many negative things manifest as my actual life. this one life i have, so precious, i ”damaged?” for no reason ? mane to connect with those who were accessible to me or i was curious about. i think about the end of “the lobster” when it comes to thinking of relationships

… sometimes. maybe that’s normal. but i’m worried it’s not - that a lot of my coping isn’t normal. and that’s a bad thing. i was always drawn to those who are at the “edge“ artistically i guess. personalities that are very different. i didn’t know the consequences of admiring that (?) until now ?

don’t want to feel alone anymore, or go to places that make me more alone. i want to find my place. it helps a lot to speak to others

*see

this all started in childhood when i took up identities of someone hurt to get things i wanted. but nothing was wrong. all these years later, i seek the consequences in my inaction and “failure to launch“ as an adult.

i hope it gets so much better and these years are just a dream i forget about or actually very valuable for something

why did it have to Be this way....

yesh!!! and i love your stuff so much!!!

so cute…

bruh

love these

adorable