The Baltimore Orioles are an absolutely excruciating watch right now

I think the teams scout more thoroughly now. Also the college game is much more similar to the pro game than it was even 20 years ago; less guesswork involved. The most talented players are now concentrated toward the top of the draft

Felt like he just orchestrated the entire game

No way this isn’t exactly what happened

Love a wheee when the good guys win

a polar bear standing on its hind legs on a beach ALT: a polar bear standing on its hind legs on a beach

🐻‍❄️💣
#orioles #mlb #petealonso

That's for sure. He is definitely not American citizens first.

I'm not claiming to be a hero, but with every Cadbury MiniEgg I eat, that's a dog not getting chocolate poisoning.

I've saved so many dogs.

The day is young, certainly you can do worse. I believe in you!

I'm telling you, the stupid ballroom is, hilariously and perfectly, the hill he'll die on.

It means more to him than anything, and the more his "We're tough, regular Americans" base has to pretend it is deeply concerned about "a huge, magnificent ballroom," the funnier this is all going to get.

If every member of Trump’s Cabinet doesn’t have to flee to Israel or Russia in 2 1/2 years we are doing something wrong.

How is there always room for random items in there, aren’t they already full?

With a little static and a bit of over modulation on the mics for the vintage AM feel

Insane rambling tweet from trump about James Talarico

Talarico Derangement Syndrome

the human body was not designed to know what the worst person in the world is doing every fifteen minutes

For the past 17 years, my wife has been away one week per month. The fact that I have kept myself, as well as at least 2 dogs alive during these times is my greatest achievement

Oh. Stage an assassination attempt, you say? Interesting.

OK, so it’s official from the President of the United States when someone you don’t like dies it’s OK to say “I’m glad he’s dead” we got it in writing folks

The baseball gods have spoken

I’m setting the o/u for the year at 3125

8.6 per day

Why is grape ice cream or sherbet not a thing?

Does Fox Business Network even go live tomorrow or do they just air reruns

The fuck you mean? Put the money in the bag.

Is it still satire if that’s actually what these assholes are going to say?

Warriors like it so far too

Imagine catching an inside straight and the silverback across the table from you rips both your arms off and beats you with them

Utterly clueless till the very end, and even past it. Very on brand.

None of the six are accused of crimes against children so he couldn’t give two shits.