Or a combination of, “no ma’am I think not!”and “tut-tut fluffy butt!”

Nips and pit just because 😋

How’s this?

So I’ve been working on a thing.
February at 259 lbs. And Today at 224 lbs.

A photo you’d use as an album cover.

“Which of you is the husband and which is the wife?”

Oh, no, that’s not how being gay works. You see, we’re both the baby.

Norman Rockwell Freedom of Speech man says, “If Obama destroyed the East Wing of the White House…”

If Obama destroyed the East Wing of the White House…

Only if I’m next to another lefty.

The way I prejudge and overanalyze anything I skeet.

But do I use my good stationary or a Costco receipt? And do I adhere it with fun-tak or the flavorless trident rolling I’ve been chewing since before I left work? Was it in jest or with malice like I have questions lol

And furthermore, who the hell is she talking to? And how do they know me? And why do I gotta be “the mean one”?

Overheard part of the neighbors phone call while walking to the car. According to her, I’m “no, not the bald one, the mean one with hair… yes and uses the old Hoover on the balcony.”

…..So do I get rid of the outdoor rug now?

At this point, my retirement plan is euthanasia

Remember, calories don’t count if it’s your birthday or if you don’t recognize the world you live in anymore

We Must Not Posthumously Sanitize Charlie Kirk's Hateful Life Influential anti-LGBTQ+ activist Charlie Kirk was assassinated on Wednesday. While condemning violence is something most can get behind, sanitization of his hate has gone too far.

There has been a rush among centrists like Gavin Newsom and Ezra Klein to brush over the hateful life of Charlie Kirk and valorize the man.

Let me be clear, killing Charlie Kirk was wrong and abhorrent.

We must condemn murder without sanitizing a man who built his empire on hate.

My latest piece.

Happy Labor Day

Travel Forecast for Thursday as generated by the Weather Star 4000+ emulator. At the bottom my humidity of 7% and dew point of 21°F. Everything is washed out like an analog NTSC television image, which I did by overlaying shaderglass with an NTSC shader.

Did you know someone reverse-engineered the Weather Channel computer system from the 80s/90s and now you can generate your own private weather channel for your location?

weatherstar.netbymatt.com

Anytime I say something like this people are always like… “nope, we need to *change constitution*”.

Reality check: not happening.

Stop focusing on extremes, demand things that can be done and as such… get shit done, for once.

Dook Duke, long haired male feline, 21 lbs stretching and posing for a picture on our living room carpet.

#FCF #fatcatfriday Dook Duke wants to be drawn like one of those French girls

Email list for all DOGE employees
Please ReSkeet!

Yes Sir. 😈

Hot af, thinking of all the things we could do, after those thighs are properly rubbed on of course. 🤤🤩

But… but… you look so good without clothes! 🥺

Where is home?

6 most days, 2 & 4 when home or whoring.

1/2 of my vacuum room

😬

You’re too sweet and very cute years old yourself! 😋😘

*grabs Gun Oil & poppers* 😇 Challenge accepted.

I just bought olives too!

Me… I’ll trade you a Babybel and/or some York thins. 🥺❤️😁