This is Champ, the bat retriever: the best boy

Original post

Omg we’re 40 now

Visitors to my house might wonder why there’s a musket ball in my utensil drawer

To them I would say…stay ready ain’t gotta get ready? Honestly, no idea how it got there or why it stays there. It’s just part of the law that if a thing is in a kitchen drawer for a year, it just is there now

"Someone tried to strangle Sneako", "Clavicular just had a drug overdose", I refuse to believe that understanding any of these headlines is better for me than chain-smoking

My last step before hitting send is to self-censor my outta control punctuation. I feel ya

"I owe more to Canadians than they'll ever know. In my baseball career, they were the first to make me feel my natural self."

-- Jackie Robinson

#JackieRobinsonDay

here's how the FBI extracted deleted Signal messages from an iPhone:

Watch more about this, and subscribe, here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNUO...

The evil

I wants it.

SERGEANT GANDER

I had blissfully gone for like 3 years without remembering this photo

Like, I know the line from Joey S (“the pope - how many divisions has he got?”) is probably apocryphal, but given the beefing with the pontiff, VPOTUS is like two press conferences away from saying it

“General Lee…I have no tax subsidies now”

As for me, I back the beavers

Just waiting to wake up one day and see a headline that someone in this administration is asking how many divisions the pope has

At that point, I’m going to slap the show runners for being lazy

“We’ve got more coming in” is carrying a lotta weight there

I hear “almost” is good enough in intelligence work lol

I’m not a Chernow fan. I finished the GW book (unhappily) but couldn’t make it thru Grant

A post from the CIA’s Facebook page about the 250th anniversary of Paul Revere’s midnight ride even though that was 251 years ago

It’s totally fine that the CIA doesn’t know what year it is, right?

The 250th of Paul Revere’s midnight ride was last year

News is rough these days. Take this as a reminder that it doesn’t have to be.

What do you mean I’m middle aged, you can’t prove it

*hides copy of Robert Caro’s “Master of the Senate” behind back*

Nothing to see here, nope

oh my

Remind me to tell you about my nephew and four loko lol

Let’s just say that our sacrifices to make a better world for those that came after have been for naught as the kids are making the same errors

Honestly, having a Chicago pope is probably one of the strangest and most incredible points of intersectionality in history

Going from Medicis to a guy who’s definitely eaten ballpark hotdogs defies Francis Fukiyama

We gotta do a hang

As I found when I moved there, getting Mainers to agree on a beer that represents them is nigh on impossible

Now I’m trying to think of the awful combos I had in the old port in the 2010s, but I think the pall of time mercifully hides them from me

naur, cannot deal with the thought of more

Btw. Silver Lyan in DC. Hugo Spritz Jell-O shots. The jello is on a lime rind so it looks like lime, and you chase it with champagne

Iconic

girl whomst amongst us doesn’t wish this

Never heard it called that but yes

And ugh

On that, you want a shot with?

bless her, she’s not being found and is free of this nightmare