If Christopher Nolan was brave, the Cyclops in his version of The Odyssey would be a giant Muppet.

He is…becoming.

I’ll be happy to shoot at you with the tennis ball gun.

Many are saying this.

Influencer, my ass. Y’all ain’t influencing me to do shit.

He is a blank slate.

I have never played Fortnite, but I do appreciate that they just throw in any character that has ever existed across all of time and space.

He may yet have both. Time will tell.

Okay, but that’s such a cute mistake.

He lost his beak, but he has acquired limbs. #crochet 🧶

I love it when a movie is critically acclaimed and wins awards, and then I finally watch it, and it’s dumb as hell.

I may revisit it at some point. I’m not a big Pokemon person. Arceus was the first Pokémon game I played since the original Pokemon on my Gameboy like 30 years ago.

I don’t think it’s the Taco Bell by itself. It’s the combination Taco Bell and alcohol after a long night of drinking.

I seem to be making a creature. #crochet 🧶

I started it. Only played for a few hours. It really didn’t grab me.

I require a large sandwich.

Surprise me.

PS5, no. Biggest waste of money ever. (I loved Uncharted and the Arkham games, but they stopped making them with the PS4).

Switch? Breath of the Wild, Pokémon Legends Arceus, Animal Crossing.

My birthday is this Wednesday. You have four days to get your gifts prepared.

Turning on my PS5 and Nintendo Switch for the first time in 2026 to see if there are any software updates before I turn them off again for several months.

I want to go back and play SimCity2000 again. I think I’d be better at city planning now that I’m not 9 years old.

Man powers.

Superhero idea: a man gets bitten by a radioactive man and acquires the powers of a man.

Man-Man.

Barber is such a funny job. You tell them what you want. They do something else entirely. You lie and say, “Looks great,” give them your money, and come back in a few weeks and do it again.

“The earth is round”
“The earth is flat”

Multiple cultures across multiple continents at different points in time independently believed that the earth existed on the back of a giant turtle.

Where are the turtle truthers? What are they hiding from us?!

I have decided to become AI. Please invest billions of dollars in me.

They use slurs.

You ever try a new brand of salsa and it is so spicy?

What is a mummy if not a dehydrated man?

This is the last skeet you see before you die.