Heathcliff walks down the street at night wearing a helmet that says REAL. Two owls watch him walk, and one says "That's too real."

09 Apr 2026

The Garbage Ape flies in a helicopter, waving down as several garbage cans are dropped down via parachute. A group of cats rejoice at the delivery. Two owls watch from a nearby tree, and one says "Garbage Ape drop.

14 Apr 2026

Heathcliff walks down the street at night wearing a helmet that reads "INDEED". Two owls watch him walk, and one of them says "Indeed."

17 Apr 2026

Orange fluffy cat inside my car.

I have to go to work and this is not my cat.

Trump is so desperate to claim credit for something. This debacle was 100% his fault, he insists.

@Elliana_Hau Throwback to when I got verified as the official Fox News account on Parler @FoxNewsUSA - communism not even that bad fr @1Futuree - You need to be drug tested @FoxNewsUSA - I'm high as shit

covie_93 - Threads - Seems like the Strait of Hormuz is only open when the stock market is.

Mamdani: tax the rich, tax non-resident 2nd homes worth more than $5 million The rich: This is class warfare! Everyone else: [guy from always sunny in philadelphia dressed up like luigi, holding a beer bottle and saying "Yes."

in World War 1 around 8 million horses died but in World War 2 it was under a million which can only mean horses started to evolve bullet resistance reallycoolsoup - I could convince Joe Rogan that this is real

[Name Redacted] Is It Gay For A Man To Own A Cat ? 😂 [Name Redacted] it's definitely suspect. no man in his right frame of mind owns a cat. just think about it. definitely something zesty or perverted going on.

Not unless the cat has a Tinder profile

Facebook post by Andy Borowitz. The post features a photo of Donald Trump wearing a blue suit and red striped tie, holding a brown leather book. Two American flags are visible in the background. The text above the photo reads: "Trump Says He Knows Bible Better Than Pope Because He Appears in Book of Revelation."

@borowitzreport.bsky.social

kevin.burden writes: We attended a Republican gathering so we could meet some of the candidates. The first thing my wife noticed was the family friendly atmosphere and the large number of children playing together. She said, “Honey, look at all the children.” I responded, “Yes, it’s a beautiful thing. I wonder if you would see the same at a democrat gathering.” She replied, “Why do you say that?” Me, “Because they have a habit of aborting theirs!” stevehofstetter replies: Yes, if there’s one thing we know about republican candidates, it is how much they love being around children.

Republicans love love love children...more than I can express with words.

pervocracy - probably on tumblr - Me in history class: Wow, humanity has been through some fascinating times! I wonder if I'll ever live through major historical events! Me now: NO NO NO NO NO I WANT TO GET OFF THIS RIDE

*ugly crying* let me off

Ok… draw a baby. Just draw a baby. Sure! You got this. Draw a baby! How hard can it be? [Scarlet Witch standing in a doorway, shouting, "THOMAS! WILLIAM!" She is looking toward two young children in a bathtub. The children are drawn with remarkably mature, adult-like facial features and muscular upper bodies despite their small size. One child is holding a sponge, and a rubber duck floats in the water nearby.]

@PleaseBeGneiss - jeff bezos: i don’t like it when people say i look like an alien therapist: well you did exploit earth’s resources bezos: so that i can build my spaceship therapist: bezos: *licks eyeball*

@pleasebegneiss.bsky.social

the gameplay int he new call of duty cold war looks great [pic of reagan in the game and it says press f to send crack to baltimore]

Man Wearing Canadian Flag Revealed To Be American Instantly By Volume Alone - Ugh. Now He's Standing Six Inches Too Close To Everyone - [pic of a backpacker with a canadian flag on the back of it] satire

#satire

Do people know this is Automan - par excellence?!

Only one day left to preorder if you haven’t already!

monday comin'

CNN discovers that a scary number of men are sharing tips about how to drug and abuse their wives and thus rando fuckhead makes it about .... public washrooms.

Statistically speaking, women have always been far safer in a public washroom than their own bed at night.

Louisiana father kills 7 of his children plus another child in shooting at house, police say Officers fired at the suspect during a chase after he carjacked a vehicle at gunpoint, Bordelon said.

Deadliest mass shooting in the US ib more than a year and the victims are all children, almost all the children of the shooter.

www.wpxi.com/news/nationa...

I feel like if there was a big conference claiming to be against hate, and their keynote speaker had been among the top influencers of the guy who did the largest faith-based massacre in Canada, and that massacre had targeted Jews, there'd rightfully be a huge uproar.

Why has the 🇨🇦 Canadian government not opened an investigation into the Epstein files like dozens of our allies have?

we completely missed the boat

Today’s excellent quote from GenX Unfiltered, “You can’t cancel someone who wasn’t invited to the party.”

the ancient egyptians never even got to play tetris, probably wouldn't have even understood it

Homemade fettuccine noodles topped with a rich chunky bolognese sauce topped with freshly grated Parmesan in a white bowl with a piece of garlicky bread

Youngest and his gf came for a visit and asked for a cooking lesson. Taught them how to make Bolognese. And he taught his gf how to make fresh pasta. So fucking delicious