"Hey Mate, How Bout You Sort Your Own Shit Out," Says Australia WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation of Australia has today issued a stern rebuttal to the President of The United States of America. Deep into his 5th year of making America great again, Don...

Word!

www.betootaadvocate.com/hey-mate-how...

“They Looked Iranian”: Security Footage Shows Trump Negotiating With White House Patio Umbrellas for Six Hours — The Shovel Donald Trump’s supposed ‘talks’ with Iranian officials were actually with a bunch of patio umbrellas in a White House courtyard, it has emerged.

Yeah, I know. I repost The Shovel a lot. Who cares? They're on the fucking money, aren't they?

theshovel.com.au/2026/03/25/t...

US Completely Fucks International Relations, Oil Markets and Global Economy in Order To Replace Ayatollah Khamenei With Ayatollah Khamenei — The Shovel "We have totally and comprehensively changed the first name of Iran’s leader for ever”

The Shovel has been reduced to reporting straight-up news: no comedy spin at all.

theshovel.com.au/2026/03/16/u...

FIFA Peace Prize Recipient Peacefully Starts New War — The Shovel Proving to the world that he does peace better than anyone in the history of peace, FIFA Peace Prize recipient Donald Trump has calmly, respectfully and very peacefully started a harmonious new war wi...

theshovel.com.au/2026/03/01/f...

Is it? There's not a version I could read which would take ten minutes and deliver the same information? I absolutely have to sit in front of a screen and watch YouTube and its fucking advertisements to get this information?

I have doubts.

Really? We’re Fucking Doing This Again? — The Shovel The US entered yet another war in the Middle East without any clear motive, strategy, objectives, popular support, succession plan or exit arrangement, leading to claims it has no fucking idea what it...

When Satire Is The Most Accurate News

theshovel.com.au/2025/06/23/r...

Trump Demands Tariff Case Be Appealed to Even More Supremeliest Court — The Shovel After the Supreme Court outlawed his tariffs, President Trump has declared the case will be appealed to the Even More Supremeliest Court, or until he gets the result he wants.  In a historic 6-3 judge...

theshovel.com.au/2026/02/24/t...

Sure. But the problem is, the lunatics have taken over.

Middle East Tensions Rise as US Threatens to Drop Melania Movie On Iran — The Shovel "If they continue to defy us, then I’ll authorise a full cinematic release across the country”

Shots fired! The Shovel wins The Internet today.

theshovel.com.au/2026/01/30/m...

It remaineth as ever!

A Third of Kids Can't Use Books When Starting School. They "Swipe Them Like Smartphones" A "readiness recession" is hitting classrooms.

www.zmescience.com/science/uk-s...

New $A22,000 EV takes 88 seconds to have a fully charged battery New EV with latest CATL-supplied battery swapping tech sees charged swappable battery installed in just 88 seconds.

Quick-swap battery in a vehicle with 400-500km range, and a price tag of $22,000 Ozbucks. If there's a option to add some charge to those batteries by hooking into the home solar or whatever, this is the car I want.

thedriven.io/2025/11/10/n...

Good to see Far North Queensland hasn't drifted any closer to sanity since I left it decades ago...

Yeah, but T Swift ain't in her mid-seventies. She gets there, can pull the same crowds and bring the same energy, she gets the same respect from me. Until then? She's her own thing, and honestly doesn't much interest me.

Ridiculously bad watercolour entitled 'Rainy Day'. Depicts a blue quilt on a bed, with two feet sticking out from under it. A red book lies open on the bed. On a near table is a glass of red wine. A tabby cat is curled up asleep on the floor at the foot of the bed.

AC/DC Just Rocked Melbourne So Hard, They Literally Showed Up On the Richter Scale Thunderstruck

Absolute. Fucking. Respect.

musicfeeds.com.au/news/ac-dc-j...

Police Break Up Lego Theft Ring, Recovering Hundreds of Beheaded Figurines

I'm sure this is creepy. I'm just trying to figure out how creepy it is, and why...

www.nytimes.com/2025/10/18/u...

US drops out of world’s most powerful passport top 10 list for the first time | CNN Once a ticket to visa-free travel across the world, the US passport’s potency has dwindled in recent times. And now, for the first time, it’s completely fallen off the leaderboard of nationalities ran...

Ooof.

THIS is telling.

edition.cnn.com/2025/10/14/t...

White House Announce Panadol Rapid is Linked to Stronger, Faster Acting Autism — The Shovel A new finding unveiled by the Secretary of Health and the US President has informed Americans that taking Panadol Rapid during a pregnancy can lead to faster, stronger, and longer-lasting autism  “Pan...

The sad thing about this? Kennedy will never know, nor comprehend, just how thoroughly and savagely he just got burned.

theshovel.com.au/2025/09/23/w...

SIM cards in downed drones expose Russia’s months-long plan to target Poland and Lithuania - Euromaidan Press Russia prepared drone strikes on Poland and Lithuania for months, using local SIM cards to test network connectivity.

Uh-oh...

euromaidanpress.com/2025/09/12/s...

So. Right knee joint completely replaced, Tuesday last week. Recovery and rehab going fine. Pain is tedious, though.

Bugger.

Did you get your jabs this year?

Great Cthulhu!

“Trump is a Soviet asset - and my presidency hasn’t gone the way I’d hoped” “Trump is a Soviet asset - and my presidency hasn’t gone the way I’d hoped”; president drops protocol in speech to PSD summer university

Anybody seen Trump's responses yet? I'm curious as to what mangled rhetoric missile he launches after this...

www.portugalresident.com/trump-is-a-s...

Robert F Kennedy Jr wrong about mRNA vaccines’ effectiveness – Full Fact The US health secretary has cancelled research into mRNA vaccines, but his reasons seem to be based on bad information about their effectiveness.

fullfact.org/health/rober...

Trump and Putin shaking hands in front of flags. Caption says "Putin grabbing America by the pussy."

Picture of a turtle, with a Popular Mechanics article headline above. The headline states "Scientists Just Found 41,000 Turtles Hiding In Plain Sight."

Ninja Turtles! It was only a matter of time...

(Glances sideways at Texas.)

Have to admit: if I was a federal, elected Democrat watching Trump fill DC with troops and assuming control of the police, I'd be considering an extended trip to Chicago.

You know. Before I got an involuntary trip to a cage in a Florida swamp.

Image of a black van with I.C.E written on the side. Two men in black body armour and black balaclava masks get out, each carrying an automatic rifle. In the foreground is a person wearing hundreds of sheets of paper with what looks like print on it, like the pages of a book. The person is entirely covered by the paper. One of the men in black says "I don't see anything." Caption below says Clever Migrant wears the Epstein Files to Hide from Trump Administration.

Diabetic Man With Gene-Edited Cells Produces His Own Insulin—No Transplant Drugs Required A proof-of-concept study finds that donated insulin-producing cells can be genetically modified to avoid provoking the recipient's immune system.

Cool! This is really interesting!

gizmodo.com/diabetic-man...