If you are a podcast producer you are a snake and more likely than anyone else to rat out your comrades

(scratching my tote bag) hmmm did they make a Adam ruins everything about public school fundraisers, I’d like to condescend to the little guy about how I kinda don’t wana do all that.

this is so racist

I’ve been retro mode lately

Asking people at the library if they want to play doctor

Been playing a bunch of nothing

I’m so washed and fucking ugly

When everyone in the company has a work vehicle that’s a truck and some one has like a sedan or a crossover SUV type deal as a company vehicle you know that person just jerks off in the office all day

We need to meet up for one last game of hide and seek, it’s been TOO long. And it needs to be monumental

Shinji: I'm so fucked up...

Me: (drunk at 3pm because I have a problem that will kill me at age 47) Shinji dat was goated

Today’s video is brought to you by data humper 🖕

barney when i shake a bag of barney treats

The in n out in Hanford has a slave bouncing around

The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5

To them is going to family court because they don’t know the name of their female offspring which they sired out of complete and I mean complete accident, like they had no idea what they were doing on a mechanical level and brought life into this world. I have a problem

You can show a gamer the funniest and thoughtful thing ever and they will give you a dead eyed stare, but will also show you a clip of themselves sodomizing a enemy combatant that happens to be a child playing battlefield like it’s evidence of them overcoming the greatest hardship ever which…

Anyone else nostalgic for a time

Bill Pullman in casper family guy peter outfit tutorial

You used to be able to go on a forum and find a busty white woman with a wardrobe exclusively of a graphic tee with a phrase on it along the lines of “i love wookie cock” and she could become your wife. You can’t do that anymore

Dead ass being horny is a vibe

Don’t bother going to any rapture yard sales, it’s all Temu crap. Nothing of value in those houses, not a lick of taste. Just hobby lobby and buccees home goods

DVDs used to be fun, now you might as well just shoot yourself in the head because honestly what’s the point of anything. Like fuck me and my dumb little life. KILL ME NOW

Can I be your excellent specimen

A bodega cat is basically the ocks labubu

The reason is unNoem

~an @afraidofwasps.bsky.social original~
"DAMN That's Funny 😂"

Took a crap so big I started barking during heaves