the way Trump tried to hard launch a terrible idea that would ruin the country and then just kinda dropped it proves that he is so Housewives-coded

should have explained it to his team

British ppl are kinda pushing it with the whole measuring weight in stones thing. Like, please be real.

The Pitt should have released 20 seasons at once. They should have incepted us tbh.

What!? I still have $3 left in credit and that takes like 10 years to use -- oh I see why it's shutting down.

it's fun that at Taco Bell the kiosk asks you what drink you want as if you're not going to have to fill that up yourself, it's like okay wow thanks for your interest in me -- is this a date?!

if you spend enough time at NY Public Libraries, you'll witness God's many varieties of John Lithgows

that feeling when I get to go home and charge all my devices 🥰🥰🥰

After spending about two full minutes trying to screw in my Stanley Cup lid the wrong way and being baffled what was going wrong, I'd like to formally resign from the year 2025. I gave it a shot, but ultimately not for me. Thanks for the opportunity!

Ridiculousness

no spoilers, but I think The Traitors is proof that door knock sounds aren't really that gendered

The next James Bond should be Pierce Brosnan.

DNC leadership has a rising star I see!

I tip delivery people a lot, not just because they deserve it, but because I should be punished for being lazy.

If your name is Dan, but people don't call you Dan The Man, idk that's pretty messed up imo.

Happy Valentine's Day! If your someone who thinks you're hiding the fact that you hate your partner, you're not! We all talk about it all the time!

the year is 2025

Duolingo social team rly embodies "say yes to everything"

by "Celine jeans" I assumed they meant "jeans you wear while listening to Celine Dion's Falling Into You"

good either way

The Eagles coach's wife still has to carry a clear stadium bag -- the indignity!

not the mock chop!

I know what he meant but "thank you Rupert Murdoch, we're all here because of you" was a dark moment

Harrison Ford said the Jeep wave will heal America

This Super Bowl on Fox would be better if it was followed by an all-new The X-Files.

🕯 🕯
🕯 🕯

🕯 mutual nemesis
w/Kendrick 🕯
🙏
🕯 🕯
🕯 🕯

I've never seen someone feature on a song not as a musician, but purely as a fellow hater. Respect.

Aren't Lilo & Stitch and How To Train Your Dragon already movies or am I from the future?

because Sunday is the Lord's Day I'm probably gonna spend a lot of time on Trolls TikTok

I know that NewYork woman who was catfished in Pakistan is gonna try to get on the B15 bus tomorrow like nothing happened.

It's Caitlin Clark
It's Caitlyn Jenner
It's Catelynn from Teen Mom
It's Kaitlin Olson
It's Kaitlyn from the Bachelor
It's Kaitlan Collins

We're not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with us.