v_flowerに対する「ifのフラワ」がCi flower。
最近、界隈の人が発言した「Ci flowerによる別の世界線のv_flower曲があるかも」との概念は趣が深い。

Ci flowerの大人っぽい歌声や、どことなく自己評価が低そうな雰囲気（俺たちの妄想）とか、本当に「別世界のフラワ」的な部分が特質だと思う。

🍩美味しいね…

知声ちゃんのお誕生を祝う動画で使用していただいたイラストです！改めて知声ちゃんお誕生日おめでとう〜🙌✨

一龠 / v flower
www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm4342...
ファンアートです！
#sm43425730
#ニコニコ動画

顔お気に入りだから見て！

花ちゃん！

天使悪魔花ちゃん💜

#ふらわ〜と
ピアプロもあるよ〜

#ふらわ〜と
片目隠れ糸目八重歯talkフラワ

#ふらわ〜と

v flower #pixiv　#v_flower　#ふらわ〜と
www.pixiv.net/artworks/143...
※初期の方のflowerちゃんです

women

I need you to remember that CPTSD is an unreliable narrator-- but also a CONVINCING narrator. Trauma will dramatize its sh*tty narrative about how you suck in such seductive ways, that remembering it's actually full of sh*t is a big ask.

But do remember: it IS full of sh*t.

Be frustrated, be pissed, about the fact you're not great at emotional regulation or managing your money or being on time or whatever. You get to have feelings about it all.

And: give yourself credit & grace for the fact you're working on it. You DON'T deserve to be punished.

Reclaim language your abusers took from you.

They don't get to gatekeep sh*t.

Everything that you are struggling w/ makes sense, whether or not you can connect the dots at this moment. You are not "crazy." You are injured, emotionally "sunburned"-- but what you need is figure-outable.

Breathe; blink; focus.

Giving ourselves sh*t for not being further along in this trauma recovery process than we are has never, not once, resulted in feeling or functioning better. We are where we are & we need what we need. No shame.

Get realistic & compassionate about what you need today.

It's true, we shouldn't have to navigate interactions w/ certain family members like we're stepping through a minefield-- but we do. The fact we "shouldn't have to" doesn't change that fact. Realistically prep for those interactions. Go in w/ a strategy & tools. Safety first.

You're not going to fail.

You're going to figure it out.

People, organizations, & institutions that are unwilling or unable to acknowledge your experience, feelings, & needs are not serious about being part of your trauma recovery.

You will not have to beg or scramble for validation from your real recovery supports.

Profound philosophical realizations about why our nervous system is vulnerable to melt downs won't do us much good when we're melting the f*ck down in the moment. Easy does it-- breathe, & focus in on supportive, pre-scripted self talk. Get through this minute. Be there for you.

I understand self-talk won't solve all our trauma problems or symptoms. It's not supposed to. But we're not going to solve those problems or manage those symptoms if we're talking to ourselves like our bullies & abusers did. Supportive self talk is a necessary starting point.

Doing something today that you like, for no other reason than you like it, is important to your trauma recovery. Pleasure, fun, & meaning matter when the goal is actually wanting to live. They are survival tools, for EVERY survivor. Do not, do not, do not neglect them.

lipstick on the joint 💋

Art of my ocs, Gina and Aiko. Gina has a purple cloud themed conductor suit and Aiko is a vampire with a pink rose prince suit with rose patterns on the shirt and heart shaped bows. Gina has a heart shaped hole in her chest and aikois holding a gold heart, with a stem inspired by arteries and a leaf

Heart of gold
{ #art #oc #myart }

I don't care how lucky you've gotten in your life-- at last some of the steps you've taken & the progress you've made is due to your intelligence & work. CPTSD is going to try to tell you you've "never" taken a "real" step forward, but that's just not true. You have.

The trick to shaking out of a "freeze" response is to relax into it-- the harder you try to push your way out of it, the more paralyzing it'll get-- & then start w/ the teeniest, tiniest movement you can manage. Wiggle your pinkie or big toe. Then let that little movement spread.

I don't care how big the project is: it reduces down to something manageable this hour, this minute. CPTSD wants you to believe because you can't eat the whole elephant in one bite, it's un-eatable. That's not true. Just break it down to what you can nibble-able this minute.

Recovery Supporting Question (RSQ): What would make it feel 1% safer to NOT do this self-sabotaging thing that I've been convinced I "have" to keep doing? What would realistically need to happen for me to not do it?

We hang on because it's safe, not because we "like" it.

Remember that trauma recovery is a daily intentional process. Some days will be easier than others. Some days will suck like a Hoover. But we're making purposeful changes in our nervous & endocrine systems here, & that requires consistency-- especially on the sh*t days.