How awful is your behavior that you have to resign from the Trump White House over it?

I am so excited to see how this turns out, along with the fans of every time that has to play the 49ers.

this is also a pretty accurate summary for when he finally fucking kicks the bucket

I tried to map out how I think the NFL season ought to go, and it's pretty hopeless. It'll get even worse when they fuck over the NFLPA in the next labor deal and it goes to 18 games and it's just never ending.

Hard to get excited for the NFL draft when the last 2 months of all sports-adjacent media has been MOCK DRAFT 3.0, CHECK OUT THIS TRADE I CAME UP WITH, WHO WILL DRAFT A BUST, STOCKS RISING/FALLING, HOW WILL IT PLAY OUT etc. I actually think the NFL would benefit from going dark until 2 weeks before.

Sketch Idea: The T2 scene at the home of the Cyberdyne creator Miles Dyson, only instead of Sarah Conner/Terminator going through the AI-to-Sentience-to-dystopia timeline, they go through the AI-to-Deep Fakes-to-Will-Smith-Eating-Spaghetti-To-Dumb-Boomers-to-Tech-Billionares-to-Dystopia Timeline.

I want to emphasize that I wasn’t like, an abused child, and I should have specified that the entire phrase was “If you don’t stop crying, I’ll give you something to cry about.” So I’m not trying to fellate myself for healing generational trauma or anything.

My daughter has turned six and I am proud to say that I have never used the phrase “I’ll give you something to cry about” which I feel like I heard from my parents pretty regularly throughout my childhood.

I’m watching Outcome (2026), and it’s too early to say whether or not it is funny and/or good, but man does it have a crazy eclectic cast. I’ll keep watching at this point just to see who’ll show up next.

Just had a dream where I got diagnosed with cancer, went through chemo, came out clear, then got told that they think I never actually had cancer to begin with. I think I was asleep for a total of 20 minutes. It wasn’t even an emotionally affecting dream. What the fuck.

"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone" is supposed to be advocacy for non-violence based on everyone being an imperfect hypocrite to some degree. But it doesn't really account for how cool it sometimes feels to be chuckin' rocks.

And yet... even though it's skirting the barebones qualifications of being a sandwich, I think this fits my personal feelings of a sandwich more than some food items that are granted that title automatically.

I'm not totally convinced that the DtFH bars on "Clint Eastwood" by the Gorillaz aren't just word salad nonsense, but man, it's the best word salad nonsense out there, and I love it.

Was listening to a podcast that mentioned a man named Tony Rosato did the voice of Luigi for some animated version of the Mario Bros, only I heard it "Tony Risotto" and it made me (briefly) so happy. It sounds like a JKR-named wizard from Italian Hogwarts, or a rejected Goodfellas parody skit name.

a man in a suit and black turtleneck is standing in front of an elevator and asking lester is this what you want ? ALT: a man in a suit and black turtleneck is standing in front of an elevator and asking lester is this what you want ?

I haven't seen it in probably a decade, but the first season of the Fargo television show probably has the best expression of chaotic evil I've ever seen in Billy Bob Thornton's role of Lorne Malvo. It is both chilling and a delight to watch this fucker wreak havoc.

RFKJ would be the funniest fucking thing in the world if he wasn't in a position of power implementing his insane fever dreams as domestic health policy

calling the esteemed offices of Hamburger, Hot Dog, Pizza, and Nachos PLLC to see if they're willing to stand by their orde...opinion

can't believe you're discounting the legal knowledge of...

*squints to read list*

Phil Hamburger

I love Trainspotting. Great movie, great soundtrack. Love it.

I also sometimes think about when it came out, there were stylized in-your-face movie posters with all the characters in this film, grinning, as if this was a Marvel movie, and not a film about the horrors of heroin addiction.

There is only two that come IMMEDIATELY to mind for me, movies where the soundtrack are so ingrained with the movie itself that I can't think about the film without thinking about the songs and vice versa.

The Crow
Trainspotting

And, man, three quarters of that killer run of writers really have not aged well at all. Alan Moore supremacy.

Why is Spawn in Soul Calibur games? Why is Spawn treated like it was noteworthy? Was it actually and I just checked out before it got good/popular? The most interesting things about Spawn were introduced in comic-celebrity-guest-writer-run when he had Gaiman/Moore/Sim/Miller write for him.

I started writing this (and then got sidetracked) to say that outside of the cool McFarlane art, I don't understand why Spawn was ever popular. He looks cool, he's back from hell, the costume is sentient, there are demons, aaaaand that's kind of it? It's not remotely compelling past that pitch.

It's a shame that so much of it just sort of... fell to shambles. Inconsistency, months between issues, I just remember so much filler. Outside of Savage Dragon, which somehow churned out new issues every month over and over again forever. ANYWAY.

Image started up while I was in my comic-interest-apex. I thought some of the ideas (and still do) had a lot of potential and there's the makings of some really cool comics. All of the lore surrounding Team 7 was really good, and made for a good lore pillar that a lot of Image built around.

can't wait for the film version of today's events to be on Netflix in a decade for everyone to relive the awfulness, "On High Alert" starring an unhinged David Harbour as Trump, Glen Powell as Hegseth and a greenscreened anthropomorphic couch for the Vance scenes.

There is an exit on I-30 in Texas between Texarkana and Dallas, and the town is called “Cumby,” and it has never felt right to me. I feel like there’s an investigative podcast season that could cover whatever the fuck is going on in Cumby, Texas - and it’s not pretty.

On the one hand, I feel like there should be SOME consistency to the adversary naming convention, and either Wario or Waluigi should change their name. On the other, is it funnier if it's completely random? Maybe Peach's alternate is named Wapache or Wapeech? What if Daisy is Daisywa? ANARCHY.

Blue Sky has been really unreliable today. I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that it's really tempting to go back to that other place, which is even more unreliable and is also run by and filled with inbred nazi goblins and no longer has most of the people I care about. SO TEMPTED.