I told this one to my wife and she just said "goodbye"

Did you hear about the latest #dragrace scandal?

There was a Monk's Ball, but everyone showed up as the same one. That's right, it was Tenzins, Tenzins across the board!

This could also be me and my wife, except both my wife and the ghost of my mother would flip 😌

Yes, they fired all their designers

Is he a purr machine? Cats purr on their family to help them heal 🥰

A black void cat looks off in a way that makes it appear that she has naught but tumbleweeds in her head. No thoughts. Not a single one. Just stupidity and love.

@anavocado.bsky.social Bluesky still doesn't let you DM images, so behold my stinky derp!

The year is 2076. I am forced to make ends meet by being a DJ. The only song I play is "Turn Down for What" interspersed with audio clips of an old man going "eh?" "Try the other ear." "My wife left me" "she actually died of cancer"

The other WWXVII survivors are not amused, but they tolerate me.

No, JOHN, you didn't "go native", SHE "went colonizer"

"In our community, we receive new names based on actions and character."

"Huh... so what's his name? The guy telling a story. Everyone else looks uncomfortable."

"Oh, that's Shitter John."

"...how'd he get his name?"

"He tells the story of each and every one of his poops."

@bsky.app if you pledge and follow through on not allowing hate, nazis, and transphobia on this platform, I will subscribe to any paid plan you offer.

Soooooo I'm engaged now to the most beautiful, kind, and considerate woman I've ever known

These are amazing!

Would you love me if I was a Shai-Hulud

A photo of Steve Harvey looking like he is about to cry, with the caption "When your best friend's parents say you're not a guest anymore, you're family"

Yeah, don't trust that for a moment. 15 years being "family" until it turned out my friend was a narcissist, harassed me, and the family chose his lies rather than admit he's an abuser. Shouldn't be allowed near kids but somehow still is.

A New Constellation - Sewell Collins magazine cover, 1910

Scott Pilgrim and Ramona standing next to each other. Over Scott, the caption says "me putting 'genderfluid' on my profile in 2016". Over Ramona the caption reads "Me in 2023"

Made a meme mine 😜

✨Ethernet Cable Girlfriend✨
A new comic I made last month! It's posted in it's entirety here, but you can find the e-book at the end of the thread if you'd rather read it that way. Thank you to all my patreon supporters who made this possible ❤️ Enjoy!
(1/6)

And suddenly all the bots replying to me whenever I say "c*mmission" 🙄

!jazbot whereami

I want to commission someone to paint this in a Renaissance style

Heat from Fire would be a good title for an action movie about a trans woman assassin killing a bunch of Fascists.

A perspective shot looking down into Morrigan's cleavage. She is wearing a black top and a short skirt. A dog's paw is peeking into frame

I'm definitely enjoying the view these days

Cock pushups. You only need to be able to do one.

🎵Take a look, it's in a book, we're reading Death Note🎶

A brindle dog on a couch sniffs at a purple coffee mug that has the text "Night Vale community radio" on it

Caffeine acquired! Puppy cuddles engaged

Retransition, babies~