This would fix me

It was so random and genuine 🧡 nice to remember i am not in fact talking to myself all the time lol

What if we're the tamagotchi

I went to a house party last night and the host was excited about my blog and asking about it and it was the first time in a while i could just be happy about a project that was actually happening and not just a pile of notes that MIGHT get released

Im still lost?? Like even her husband was already sitting up?? She was like “well i dont know that rules here.” Its like asking the waiter if you can eat your food. “Yes.” 😂

Today a women asked me, as she was laying down on a mattress, if she was allowed to sit-up and i was confused because why do you need permission to sit-up and she got really irritated with me cause i just said “yes.”

an autism screening would be so redundant at this point 😭

how could I, a laymen who just wants an edit button, mistake the root issue of the elaborate infrastructure of web design that seems to now have malicious intent toward us, the laymen.

“Why are people blaming AI when the culprit is (keyboard smash youre claiming means something)?”

Yea, tru, u rite doe, fr, makes sense, ya got me

The influencers are NOT happy 😂 they are pissed about no one being fully “present” or “authentic” 😂 like it used to be this spiritual retreat and this is all new 😂 where is Vanessa Hudgens when you need her 😂

“Coachella was weird this year… this is my 9th Coachella.”

Diva, you’re an elder. This isnt your ish anymore, make room 😂

Not Young Thug going “where are your parents?” when he spotted North West at his Coachella set 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

Who are you

I absolutely disagree that sleeping with a teenager is an improvement on anything. don’t bring me into that.

how do u think spongebob achieved his consent based culture where victims feel safe? through jihad

what if it was legal to get cyberbullied

a two panel meme panel 1 - geordi signalling 'no' with the text data centres and images of data centres Panel 2 - geordi signalling 'yes' with the text "data centaurs" and a crudely edited image of the character data from star trek pasted on top of a centaur

do you ever wake up at 3am and think "shit that's a good idea, I better write that down so I can share it later on"

Whose running group today? That matters

Sometimes you really do have to put on your “I know you fucking lying” eyes.

Unhinging my jaw to eat the super gummy

Your handler? Right?

remembering when I was a young grape experiencing the vineyard

@cockremover.bsky.social your darling is asking for you

Yeah, crazier than any other form of algorithm dating, am I right?

No but theres only Sagittarius?????

And the first person they suggest is a Sagittarius…….

The people at Tinder heard me talking shit so they added an astrology mode. Is it gonna work? probably not. am I on there? absolutely.

im always saying this 🙂‍↕️

a mouse (?) eating cherries (?) and dyed purple around the mouth

girls want one thing, and it's to be this weird little dude absolutely lost in the sauce