A form telling me that corey@shitposting.monster isn't a valid email address.

Yes it is, you dumb fuck.

Western Union??? Does bitcoin know you're cheating on it?

Twitter user parenth_: pediatricians are the lowest paid doctors for a reason - they bring the least value to society. kids are healthy by virtue of being brand new. how often do you bring a brand new car to the mechanic?

My new year's resolution is just to serve cunt tbh

and how would you rate your support experience? We value your feedback.

.
ME:

"I look good!"

MIRROR:

"You look good!"

OTHER PEOPLE:

"You look good!"

WINDOW REFLECTION:

"You look good!"

FORWARD-FACING PHONE CAMERA:

"What's up, you trollish bag of fuck?"

wait, you aren't? who'd i vote for then?

you might be a slow metabolizer of caffeine - this can also be altered by things like hormone levels, other drugs, and liver function

forbidden milkshakes

whatever am i to do with myself?