it’s a great day for transphobes to eat shit

working from home

Always glad when my flying pets visit.

black and white drawing of an underwater scene. a large bird sticking it's head into the water, surrounded by shocked fish

WHATS UP YOU WET MOTHERFUCKERS

Imagine dragons? An IMPERATIVE?!

Picture your OWN mythical beasts, sirrah!

The unimaginable CHEEK.

Three panel comic. Panel 1: scene from the movie Aliens; Ripley is in a mech suit and delivers her iconic line: “get away from her, you bitch!” Panel 2: the xenomorph queen lunges at Ripley in the robotic suit and they engage in a fight. Panel 3: later, the xenomorph queen is standing in the shower, mid wash. She says, “‘it takes one to know one, honey.’ That’s what I should have said.”

Tabby kitten peeking from behind a desk with text above. Transcribed Text: can't have 3rd dinner can't eat plastic can't eat my humans toes can't meow at 3am can't do anything

Sunday

A cloud that looks like it has a deflector shield, or maybe it’s just me, I dunno.

“Shields up!” the cloud said.

Elsa pops her area denial ult while Rocket Raccoon lays down suppression fire and Glup Shitto spams voice lines.

At this point, I think hot warm towel is just swapping the specks between eyes.

A well-meaning email assuring me that my best years aren’t behind me. Thanks, email.

Guess which thought had never occurred to me before this email.

Anyone need help getting tiny painful specks in their eyes?

Apparently I'm an expert.

Anyone know how to say "No, move to the room with that plants. That's where the bugs are," in giant house spider language?

A camera notification. “Cat meows detected, person detected multiple times”

Busy day for the garage camera.

(The person was me, looking for cat)

Baked a loaf for tomorrow

Can’t eat it yet so

I walk back into the kitchen once in a while to pat it

It’s a good loaf

The "Calvin's Dad Explains Everything Meme" except he's explaining that Calvin and Hobbes are Calvin and Hobbes.

It haunts me.

My husband, explaining to my 8-year-old why Jaws is an anti-capitalist movie: If the mayor had just listened to the experts and closed the beach instead of trying to make more money, the movie would've been over 5 minutes after the first shark attack.

Turns out yes

Very possible, will research.

Had thing in eye for three hours until I gave up and tried hot warm towel.

Have you ever tried hot warm towel?

Believe in hot warm towel.

INSULINDIAN PHASMID - I exist.

YOU - I exist too.

If you're feeling sad and alone, be sad. It's allowed.

You're not alone, though. More people care about you than you can imagine.

There's a future ahead where you won't be sad either, even if that seems impossible. Imagine it. Happiness, just for you!

Man, won't that feel great? It's coming!

I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake By A Horse Hello. I am a horse. I work very hard at my job of being a horse. When humans say move the heavy thing, I move the heavy thing. When humans sit on top of me and pull on my head, I carry them where they want to go. The main food the humans give me is hay and oats. But I am thinking it would be nice to have a different food. I am thinking I would like to try cake. Yes, yes. Cake. I know all about it. When humans eat cake, it is in glad times. It is the food for a celebration, such as when a woman becomes 47. I have seen cake on the Fourth of July. When humans have a cake, they stand around it and clap hands and smile and say happy birthday at each other. Sometimes there are beautiful markings on a cake, such as balloons or a pink shape. Sometimes the top of a cake is on fire and a boy must blow on the fire with mouth wind. This is the scariest cake. I do not want this kind. But I will eat any other cake. Any cake that is not the fire cake that tries to kill the boy. Please understand: I do not get money for doing work. I do not get to go inside the house. All I am either doing my horse job or standing in my pen or eating food off the floor. I always do these things. But I have never once gotten cake and I would like it very much. I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children. I am more helpful to the farm. Children do not move the heavy things like me or let anyone ride on them. And yet they get cake. Maybe the humans will realize this. Maybe they will say, "You know who deserves cake? That horse. That horse whose back we are always on." Every day I dream about what it will be like if I get to eat cake. Here is what will happen. First, I will walk to the cake and putt my nose at it like hrrfff to make and stomping my hooves to make sure it is not a snake. Then I will trot in a circle to show that I am a horse and I am large. After that, I will nuzzle the cake to …

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me.

It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

I really thought I could get rocking chair physics right the first time around, but I was a fool.
#GodotEngine #gamedev #indiedev #ScreenshotSaturday

moby-dick, his eyes enormous: from hell's heart you STAB at moby? for hate's sake you spit your last BREATH at moby? oh! oh! the great shroud of the sea for ahab! the great shroud of the sea rolling on as it rolled five thousand years ago!!!!

God, so good,

Aaaaaaa

The whole world will be your enemy, prince with a thousand enemies. And when they catch you, they will smash you with a hammer. But first they must catch you.

Me, meeting my therapist’s new intern.