This is who Labour have handed our NHS data over to, folks.

a man is standing in front of a bookshelf in a library looking at a woman . ALT: a man is standing in front of a bookshelf in a library looking at a woman .

Thank you, I think...

I'm completely confused about whose "legitimate concerns" we are not supposed to criticise now.

Deep thought went into that reply.

Really? I didn't know that. Kid's school reports being happy with it. What do they want instead, a complete ban?

Sleeping white shibusky on an orange sofa.

Yes, although I let him decide and he has a preference. Big park in the morning, cemetery in the daytime, little park in the evening. Sofa the rest of the day.

I know, right?

There are kids in school who use smartphones to manage hearing aids and blood sugar levels. Others with caring responsibilities, or with transport tickets on them. "Off and away" is adequate, with exemptions for kids who need them. A complete ban is hamfisted nonsense headline-grabbing.

Renamed it Mackenzie Rook I hope?

My kids are half-Irish, half-Ukrainian. They won't eat potatoes...

"I'm not mad! Don't put that I'm mad in the school report!"

they're banning smartphones in schools because your posts are so bad they're a threat to the kids

Kiddo's school has an "off & away" policy from 0830 to 1500 with a load of exemptions for kids that need it during the day, the school knows who most of those kids are anyway, and kiddo reports that the 2 girls in her class who need it just take their phone out, do the thing, and put it away again.

Ordnung muss sein.

Yes, please, make the Snapchat smart glasses look *exactly* like this. Visible from a distance so we can avoid the douches wearing them.

Bought wet wipes in Germany one time. Every. Single. Wipe. came out one at a time. They absolutely do know how to do it.

Nonce-tech

Nonce-tech. They're betting on nonce-tech.

Well now I want an egg, Doc.

VERY COOL PERSON: It's four-twenty, you know what that means?

ME: Hell yeah! [starts shoving blackbirds into a pie]

Derpy white husky with heterochromia lying on an orange sofa.

Bowie says good night.

If you know families from any of the places I’m going to, do us a favour and tag them in. It’s a cracking show that the grown ups enjoy just as much (possibly even more) than the kids!!!

Dulwich
Chesham
Chester
Burntwood
Chipping Norton
Salford
Hertford
Exeter
Norwich
Alton
Edinburgh
Luton

Nonce-tech.

You don't mean...a Findus Crispy Pancake do you?! 😲

You're not beating the "Trekkies are weird" allegations with this.

Kid's school has recognised many pupils need them for tickets, safety etc. and have an "off and away" policy. Confiscated on sight between 0830 and 1500. Works ok.

Traumschiff - Hormuz

Worked for some Americans once and oh god the pearl-clutching whenever I made even a slightly, tiny-bit, almost imperceptibly off-colour joke.

I did years of aikido. I've only ever had to use it in self-defence a few times but oh boy the breakfalls have saved my arse multiple times.

You'll be HiH (head in hands) afterwards.