Pale purple iris flowers with sunny yellow centers.

Spring is here!

Momma’s bible open to Matthew 27 (story of Easter) marked by a bookmark.

Happy easter

Two women in scuba get-up with one (me) waving at the camera. The other is my SIL/instructor.

Went to the Great Barrier Reef today. 💕

Small snowman made of three balls. It has a snowman sized beanie on top and 3 buttons down the front.

Older German shepherd running and playing in the snow.

Beagle with banana running and playing in the snow

#snowday

This week has been a year long. Having whiskey and vibing to #queensryche #Enya and #BobSeger …. Just riding the vibes into Fri-yay.

So much is moving around me. I feel like everywhere I turn is unknown or unpleasant. I’m tossed so many directions and I don’t like a damn one.

Thank you. And thank you for the music! It truly has been helping me feel close to her. I had forgotten how much time she and I spent listening to music and goofing off. 💖

Fuck. Cancer. Fuck cancer. Fuck cancer.

My momma’s Queensrÿche pin - she really loved this band.

I miss my friend. I miss my concert buddy. I miss my momma. I’m not sure I’ll ever go to another concert. It won’t be the same.
Today I’m listening to @queensryche.bsky.social and crying. I love you, momma.

Took my dad to the pawpaw festival. If he thinks he can get out of “yard food” just cause momma isn’t here…. He’s wrong. 😂

The same home mammaw she and I had Pappaw removed from … mammaw and I called to have her removed from. If I’m lucky, I’ll have mammaw removed from this home too. But then I’m burning it down. That home. Our home. My home. Isn’t home without them.

Momma holding her warm apple cider cup Dec ‘24

Trigger Warning. Do Not read.
A home in the hills is where my mother was born. The first home. Our first home. Was our last. My grandmother’s home gave us shelter when I was born. Momma was so young. The same home momma died in. Momma was so young.

She improved on chemo. But pneumonia took her.

A photo of my momma reaching for newborn me.

A photo of momma on vacation- wearing tie dye and excited to spend the day in the ocean.

My mommy. Fixing my wedding veil before we hop in her truck for my wedding.

A photo of me and mom telling my sis we were good.

I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.

Trigger warning: illness/end of life
More of a diary post than anything.
The last few weeks have been a lot. Mom + dad had appointments- went from that to almost losing mom. We did a “shot in the dark” chemo and now we’re discussing continued treatments and she’s off of the tube soon to be home.

Lightning bug and lady beetle in the petal of a lily flower.

I’m not sure what kind of rendezvous I’ve stumbled on here.

Painting of a rocket ship blasting though space.

I played with blocking latex this morning and painted something for my friend’s baby who will be one soon. My friend’s family and mine like to nerd out about space and fossils so I felt like this was fitting.

For my grandma’s birthday gift I painted a sunset. More than one person has pointed out that it looks like the sunset on the family property I used to live on. It probably is now that that’s been pointed out. The only time I feel truly at peace is when I’m deep in the woods on that ridge side.

via Wild Bird Scoop

The current situation reminds me of two kindergarteners fighting over the ball at recess not knowing that it actually belongs to everyone and not either of them specifically.

If it were two adults I could see this policy being upheld- but this is a child and a parent. I wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving my child alone. And from the shop’s standpoint- I wouldn’t want to be responsible for another persons child without their guardian there.

Orange bands of clouds though a dark sky which is rested over over hills

When things are not going according to plan- it’s nice to still be able to enjoy a sunset with people you care about.

Some friends and I had “field day” to celebrate my birthday that was earlier this month. It was so much fun to play and not worry about adult stuff. The sack race is a lot harder as an adult than I remember it being 20-30 years ago and my bruises from the tug of war games are only surface level. 😂

The last few weeks have been rough for me mentally and emotionally. I’m to the point of self isolation but my cat will not leave my side. No wonder my family jokes that he’s my familiar.

This morning dad said that mom was awake. I burst into their camper (we went camping for Mother’s Day) and she was asleep. I didn’t realize until after I had already shouted at full volume. I am always on my own list of reasons to remain child free.

My husband took my dogs to my birthday camping trip with my family. I get to stay home for half of it because I have to work. (I usually have the day off but something came up) I’m cleaning my house and thinking about eating a whole pizza to drown my sorrows.

I’m still so embarrassed for crying at the grocery store in the baking isle the other day.

I have a friend who once was perusing a music career. He texted me the other day to say that his Spotify songs have been getting traction again out of the blue. I’m so happy that even if he’s not doing it full time, he still loves sharing his art with the world.

I was just reminded about the MTV film 2tether thanks to my music app playing random songs. Man, the 2000s feel like a fever dream with the nostalgia glasses on.