the half resuscitated corpse of berlonk looks ugly as fuck

they fired half my department so if you need a job hmu i guess lmao

just saw the man that literally put the shirt on my back

plz send them my way omg

damn what did i do to you gayguy?

i’m putting in the hard work for you king

have you tried heroin

i don’t have enemies anymore EXCEPT this guy that shoves in front of me to get on the bus every morning then walks slow as fuck the whole way

i’ll do it for you

uber eatsed

love when my doctor tells me about what he did at belly up 🥰🥰

someone without bluesky said it and i thought it was funny 🫶

they’re breathing hot breath on my nachos baby i’m already rolling burritos

damn it’s like nobody wants to go get martinis on a sunny beautiful sunday afternoon anymore we used to be a real country

since i missed belly up last night ill be hosting belly down in my apartment starting right now bears come over put your belly down on me

skater don’t spoil my fun!!

me and this giant babybel. babybelXL

no like so painful it’s not even funny i don’t fuck with hollow eve but she did eat that one thing

+ incredibly good luck channeling all the clumsy into just the glasses

ill be there

not only am i cheesy, im corny too

can’t rt this hard enough

Yeah I'm corny??? I'm Midwestern?????

hear me out

boochie muncher

fat white opium trade at the shein factory okay okay

just pissed all over betty thefts toilet seat AMA

Why do butts look like that? And by that I mean So Fucking Good

i think i know someone who can help

unemployed as fuuuuck (work full time but get off at 2pm the day is mine to enjoy every day)