This needs to be a one-act play...

I was just saying this to someone at the pregame tailgate

Diamond Station Zebra

Happy birthday, and your emoji game is on point!

I have another manual transmission joke, but I don't want to let it out early.

Congrats to Dartmouth Men's Hockey, 2026 ECAC tournament champions! Surpassed the 1979 and 1980 squads that finished second in the East during my college years. Makes this WDCR/WFRD sportscasting alumnus very happy. On to the Regionals!

I have a manual transmission joke. I heard it from the guys on the third shift.

Still recall a Joe Garagiola feature about baseball in Italy that aired on the Today Show in the 1970s. "Error-e! Error-e!" shouted the exuberant fans in unison, like a football chant. Congrats!

Great coverage - you've had us refreshing every 30 secs in the 3rd pd. Thanks!

Thanks, hon! Game's already a barnburner, would have been a total crusher to miss it! How could I have slept throughzzzzzzzzzzz

RIP Bill Mazeroski, HOF second baseman for the #Pirates. I'm reliably informed that I was in the crib listening to the radio broadcast when he hit his Game 7 walk-off home run to defeat the Yankees in the 1960 World Series. I trust my source.

Nobody at the IOC:

Absolutely nobody at the IOC:

Me: "Halfpipe Monobob"

IOC: ...so, more Curling, then

MONOBOB!

MONOBOB! #monobob

A very old, beat up, torn, yellowed copy of the mass market paperback edition of LeCarre's espionage novel SMILEY'S PEOPLE, the pages of which are held together with two rubber bands.

On your local library sale shelf next to John LeCarre's SMILEY'S PEOPLE BAND TOGETHER.

After which time, ageism in the Cretaceous job market took its toll.

The SNL Contractual Obligation season continues.

Said it before: a penalty shot foul in hockey should result in a penalty shot *plus* two-minutes in the box.

Bray of Pigs

This hasn't felt like Friday, the whole day.

I've been a sports fan for life, my favorite team has a great coach (manager), and even so, I agree with the epithet "gym teachers".

Hot take: pre-game studio shows have pretty much run their course.

Fell asleep for most of the second half and still put up more points than the Packers.

Great fun to see the Division III MSOE women's hockey team beat Lawrence this afternoon. But don't worry; he's okay. #rimshot

Thanks to all the baseball writers who worked overtime to publish today's World Series postmortems. Not ready for the reading-about-#MLB season to be over!

Also, to "Eleanor Rigby."

Marking myself safe after an 18-inning, 6:39 game. In case anyone asks.

We met you once during an AFP pre-show meet 'n' greet in Denver. I remember you differently.

Not the best era for an INTP. The F and J are annoyingly nosing their way into the proverbial tent.

Won't have clarity on that until after the work stoppage.