Discovered that Costco is discriminating against Graphic Designers

#GraphicDesign

Just learned Yungblud is actually called Dominic Harrison

He sounds like an MP for Kenilworth and Southam

Robert F. Kennedy is claiming autistic people can't use toilets, and tbh I'm happy to prove him right on this one.

I will shit on his fucking doorstep.

I also forgot to mention I got told I had long eyelashes and that was "very unfair" by the nurses, I then had half an hour fluttering them at my opthalmologist who was the most attractive person I've ever met.

"We're just gonna take Ukraine, ok Hun?"
"Yes Daddy"

Passed my eye test with flying colours! Bit surprising seeing as I could see flying colours but hey

The good thing about Kanye being a Nazi is he hasn't released a good album since like... Last decade, so who gives a shite

I'm in my "drink 2 beers and think about the implications of the thoughts I think" era

Sadly I'm not absolutely hench, and my hair isn't as lustrous as his

My friend's 30th birthday party is themed around animated characters, I'm very tempted to go as Ned Flanders (complete with authentic moustache and left-handedness)

Not to get political, but Welsh cakes are the greatest bread product ever

#CymruConfection

The eagerly unanticipated sequel: a lovely dusk that I couldn't finish before my bus turned up

Watching people board the Gay Trans-Pennine Express train and wondering whether there's some prick who'd rather wait an hour for the next one because he isn't... You know, one of those....

I'm really enjoying painting simple lil things on my phone

Here's a man and his dog I tried to do

At one point I had a brilliant idea for a sci-fi story (to be submitted to a literary journal that no longer exists), this is how far I got before I gave up...

A recycling bin has just crashed into my bus

#StormEowyn

YouTube thumbnail of James May's Planet Gin video "James May Rates Celebrity Drinks"

Like to think James is giving Ricky Gervais a one star review

Irish Star headline reads Trump Tower Las Vegas fire after Cyber truck causes 'boom boom boom' explosion

When asked for comment, Trump declared "War on Terror" and vowed to have troops on the ground within the week.

The idea of parking fines is absurd, I mean you've offended someone so badly with your parking that they're asking for reparations?

The other recommendations are people taking Flight Simulators very seriously and PS Vita fan accounts just in case you care

I keep getting recommended like... Taylor Swift fan account posts on insta, and the last one was her wearing two skirts.

Apparently she has new skirts!

So proud of you Taytay

A person in a Snoopy costume with the face pokin out just below the nose hands another Snoopy a pill and says "let's do some molly before the Snoopy Rave." Their pupils enlarge and the other Snoopy says "aw yeah, I'm comin' up" They are in a darkened room with a large group of other Snoopy's vibing as DEEP HOUSE MUSIC plays in the background. They dance in a fashion that is typical of Snoopy witch his bowling pin shaped head outstreched to the ceiling, his arms splayed and feet pattering rapidly on the ground. Suddenly, an intruder! A snoopy points and says "yo, that guy's dressed like Brian Griffin." Another Snoopy says "get the fuck out of here, dude." The sense of rejection is evident on the Brian's face.

Are we calling Elon stans Cybercucks yet or...?

Just seen a 60 year old guy drunkenly embrace his mates and say "You boys changed my life"

Truly a sign of Christmas

@the-dnb-farmer.bsky.social die hard is a Christmas movie

New York Times Spelling Bee game, spelling out the word Anticlimactic which is not in their word list

I got so excited by this answer, fittingly unsatisfying

It's funny tesco are using gorillaz in their Xmas ads because I use that song as a reminder I need scones, melons, cauliflower and maybe a bottle of Hills and Harbour gin.

Scone, Melon, Cauli, Hill

#shopping

Just gave someone the correct directions to the bus station, so I now feel like a Proper Adult

Well, actually, I feel like I've given him the wrong directions even though I've literally just walked by the station 10 minutes ago

Maybe burning self doubt is part of Proper Adulthood...

To the man who decided to teach me the benefits of marijuana, I don't disagree that it shouldn't be heavily criminalised (if only to avoid ppl lecturing strangers about the benefits of marijuana).

Your opener needs work, asking me if you could phone your dealer off my phone... Was not the move.

Rejected band names for this observation:

• Microplastic (Acid house)
• Manhattan Attack (crap 90s grunge revival)
• Spreadwide (metal)
• Charlie Bromide (house DJ)
• Pmurt Support (country star turned pop star)
• Warm Air (trip hop revival)
• Boys from Stockholm (Devocore)