I have previously "shot" myself in the leg by sending sticks and rocks backwards at full speed when I do the not so landscaped bit "up the back", but this was just soft new grass after the summer die-off, so it wasn't painful, just made a mess when I came inside 🙄

Friend misplaced his 25yo beloved Akubra yesterday and I just messaged another (much younger) friend wondering if he'd found his titfa. Much amusement ensued 😏

I mowed the lawns 😏
Not only did my glasses get steamy and smeary, I stupidly wore jeans with a double rolled up cuff and no catcher🤦

Bit of decent cheekbone action as well 😊

How often do other people rub their eyes before it occurs to them to clean their bloody glasses...or is that just me? 🥸🫪😏🤓

They wouldn't be remotely capable of imagining themselves ever being that vulnerable to the whims of others

Ah, yes, the strawberry tax 😀

I thought it was all sorts of art, I've heard it in relation to jewellery as well, because apparently "only god can achieve perfection" 😏

Just wondering, did the carving on the frame have an obvious deliberate mistake somewhere? Is that a tradition with Celtic design or just a myth?

Omg I had that same memory buried! I remember I felt a trickling sensation running down one side of my neck but whatever it was must have been internal as I was surprised to not see blood everywhere. PE was torture.

Blue tongue sunning herself on a bit of corrugated roofing in the strawberry patch

She said thanks, now I'll get my own

Blue tongue lizard emerging from under the house to eat strawberries

My friend heard me filling the water bowl and picking strawberries and came out to see what was going on 🤗
Yes of course I gave her a strawberry 🍓

All day yesterday I was thinking shit it's someone's birthday, who have I forgotten to send a message to?
Today I remembered...
Oh that's right...
Hitler, never mind 🙄

Oh, well, if we're getting into farming paraphernalia, I've always rather fancied an "elastrator". I've heard it's *almost painless and really quite humane 😇

Noooo that's what the groom is for 😜

Ah no, mine was around 1978 I think, Patricia was always at the tail end of a good idea 😄

They'd probably be grateful 😜

No Simon and Patricia in St George's Rd 😂

I projectiled that shit all over the mirror and washbasin at the Beaumaris Community Centre at around 15 😕

My darling Mum said oh maybe you're allergic too 🤗😇

My god, no wonder she reacted the way she did to Tom thingummy and his 'method' acting in Mad Max

Cin cin 🥂 😂

Mum told me my stepsister had discovered she's allergic to ginger and I said how on earth did she isolate that? She said she'd been sick after drinking stone's green ginger wine, and I said oh who hasn't?

My stepsister who never acknowledged Mum's wicked side, said kindly I don't think they called it that Bev, to which Mum replied they bloody should have

When they discontinued that the bottleshop recommended something else to Mum that she always called Golden Showers 🤣

I wonder if that was the same party I went to as a Black Russian and my sister was a Fluffy Duck. (Many thanks to J C Williamson's costume hire 🤗)

Blackberry nip, anyone? 🤮

Omg thanks for liking this, cos I forgot to buy more and you've just reminded me, before the shop shuts ❤️❤️

Think of the generations of "whingeing" farmers lining up to say told ya so!