Leaving out the Hartford group, bud.

I am done with the WNBA. Done. Fuck this league. Fuck Adam Silver. Fuck Cathy Engelbert.

Cristian Espinoza already the best offseason signing in MLS.

Not even three minutes in, NC State-Texas is making an excellent argument for never expanding the tournament field again.

Over on Twitter I asked FOX to let Zlatan kick Alexi Lalas in the head on live television and now I can’t tweet for seven days.

James Breeding is such a piece of trash. Fuck the Big East.

It’s interesting that Bruce Pearl now seems to think something that begins, arguably, as a valid form of defense can get out of hand and go too far.

Oscar Pareja will always hold a special place in Orlando City history. Dug us out of the bottom of the dumpster. Made us a threat. Won a trophy.

This was coming. Writing was on the wall last year. Surprised it didn’t happen after the playoff exit and the great collapse.

Wilfried Nancy, you up?

Hartford Athletic is running rampant in Jacksonville! At least the latter half of my sports day has been cheerful.

Who cares that we lost the men’s basketball game? UConn women’s hockey just won Hockey East again!

Maxime Crepeau and Dan Hurley got sent off/ejected at the exact same time, and I’m not above admitting I crashed the entirety of the fuck out. Everything is terrible.

I’m totally neutral on Tottenham as a club, but watching this cataclysmic collapse is absolute theater.

James Talarico looks like one of the kids from Sombertown in the claymation Santa Claus movie grew up to become a candidate for the U.S. Senate.

The biggest question in my life right now is, “How badly do I hate myself?”

The Antoine Griezmann brace in Fort Lauderdale is going to hit like crack.

I knew we’d have to run the full gauntlet of a Miami comeback and a red card. It was written in the stars.

The world will be a better place when Miami is back in the basement when Messi finally fucks off and the plastic disappears.

It was too good to be true.

I’m not naive enough to think Orlando City has this game in the bag. We could be in for a remarkably moronic 45 minutes. But I will cherish those first 45 minutes as long as I can. What an effort by the Lions.

a soccer player in a yellow jersey with the number 10 on it ALT: a soccer player in a yellow jersey with the number 10 on it

Duncan McGuire, apparently.

New Joran Gerbet just dropped?

AM I DREAMING? AM I DEAD?

And what a sequence by Ivan Angulo. Quiet the haters, my guy!

MARCO PASALIC, YOU ABSOLUTE GEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, TNT rolling from a USWNT win right into UConn women’s basketball playing at Storrs South is very me-friendly.

Is Orlando City about to get pummeled by the plastic tourist attraction from Miami? Probably. But I just got my dog to finally poop after 3 long hours, so absolutely nothing can bring me down tonight.

I’m an absolute mess up here right now. Can’t stop crying.

I’ve been saying all year they should wall Alex Karaban on Senior Day. They did it. It was perfect.

Not yet. Still warming up.

Alex Karaban: Husky of Honor 🥹

I’m so sad I couldn’t be in Hartford tonight to watch UConn put Rick Pitino and St. John’s in a wood chipper. Outrageous performance. Glad I ran into a fellow Husky up here in Massachusetts during the second half and got to share a moment of joy.

Next week is March. Don’t let the Huskies get hot.