Finite at freddy's

Drawing significance/ties between unrelated phenomena isn’t a symptom of epilepsy but it’s certainly a symptom of psychosis

1% of people have epilepsy which makes it sort of common as weird ailments go, but somehow every time I learn about a great artist having had it (Ian Curtis, Dostoevsky) I’m like oh, of course, I am just like these generational talents

I have pretty much the same salad for lunch every day and this is exactly what I look like getting the various components in my mouth but no one is photographing me. Can’t believe this was 2003. Kirsten they could never make me hate you

I hate when people use the “raise hand” feature on all these video call apps. for the love of god please just interrupt me I don’t want to be talking either

i sang it in an Eliot smith voice to the tune of Between The Bars. This guy has a math phd we’re gonna give him an aneurysm

TOO MANY URKELS ON YOUR TEAM THAT’S WHY YOUR WINS-LOW!!!

(scoffing) call me when youve got services

I agree!!!

I am laughing really hard and loud still because that means he thinks I would hear Nirvana’s “About A Girl“ as a waltz and be like “yeah, this is correct. as our newest bass player, I understand rhythm. It’s good that I played this for 90m in 3/4 time somehow”

Oh my god

My drummer wants me dead

idk I think most churches have widely accepted the 1990s gospel of Don Bluth as canon

Texas (When I Die)

My close personal friend Tanya Tucker confirmed that it’s just the cowboys she’s not sure about. the big JC just said “actually heaven is like mostly farmers. Maybe 70%” so I have some follow up questions I’ll get back to you once I learn more open.spotify.com/track/7iinaW...

Ok I just asked him for clarification there is an obvious exception here. As we all know, our beloved dogs are famously immortal (!!!) but IF they were to pass on, all dogs go to heaven

I took his hand off me and said “hey bud lemme close this tab I’ll order you an uber home!” that fucker waited until I went to the bathroom to go back up to the bar and order 2 waters and well. U know

I have a personal relationship with our lord and savior Jesus Christ and he got really wasted the other evening and told me that actually they dont let cowboys into heaven. and it’s like a whole thing there’s a sign like “need not apply“ and everything. And then he grabbed my boob :(

If Crazy Chester followed me and he caught me in a fog and said he’d “fix my rack” in exchange for his dog I would probably just call Animal Services. I would not engage with him further. he does not seem like a safe person to be around and I’m worried about his pet

The FBI Director Is MIA Kash Patel has alarmed colleagues with episodes of excessive drinking and unexplained absences. By Sarah Fitzpatrick

I like how this headline makes it look like the Atlantic is getting its Indian celebrities confused

Once I saw a vocal coach on YouTube explain how singers should be just trying out different noises/voices all the time and he casually slipped into a Jar Jar Binks impression. I lost my mind but he’s 100% right…I do be constantly making noises

In other music news I’m laying down in my loft bed doing vocal exercises 2 feet from the ceiling. if my neighbors can’t handle me at my Kurt cobain vocal fry they don’t deserve me at my Hank Williams yodeling

I always thought the verses of this song were too catchy and good to have to feed into a lazy chorus that just yells “SHE LIKES ME FOR ME!!! (Haha whatever I guess)?”

Im more than happy to embrace the ”failed guitarist” stereotype THAT’S RIGHT I couldn’t hack it!!! still the only guy here playing 2 instruments at once!!!

there are no non-annoying musicians but I have personal beef with guitars at the moment

(a guitar isn’t a “fake instrument” that’s obviously hyperbolic cope. there’s a lot of famous musicians who make guitars real. Nick Miller for one)

maybe I’ll learn how to do it well at some point but I’m so glad I got put out of my misery. maybe I’m just stupid!!! but it was fucking stressing me out and I’m glad I don’t have to pick one up again until I feel like it!!!!

do you understand how much easier it is to sing while playing bass, a real instrument that makes sense to my hands and brain? versus my nemesis the guitar, a fake instrument that always feels like I’m holding someone else’s baby on my body and about to drop it at any time?

I‘m learning bass after 3 years of saying “I will keep trying but I really really hate trying and failing to play guitar” and last month the guys I play with said “ok you’re like REALLY bad at this. you should not be on guitar“ fucking FINALLY

what’s your favorite song about when there’s too many puppies