Storm Warning

Important work meeting at the Lenovo Center this evening.

Ronald says sorry.

Your first brief will fail compliance check review and get rejected. It’s a rite of passage.

Other than my wife, I am the only person at my office happy hour. This is the culture I desire when I go to the office.

Alt + 0151 for those who like to memorize dumb stuff.

NICE things

I said nice things

The Constitution is, in fact, a suicide pact, and we can’t have nice things because a guy in the 1700s didn’t use the Oxford comma.

Does the IRS have a 5 pm filing deadline? Asking for me.

I prefer “BEHOLD, Y’all”

Last case I argued, appellant’s counsel started with “I can’t believe we’re here. I thought the issues were set out pretty well in the briefs.” Wild thing to say when you requested oral argument, but it’s an option.

All the allure of coffee shop writing without the grinder (and beer!)

I have refined multiple oral arguments, or at least their first two minutes, at a hotel bar.

I suspect the Pope sounds "woke" to many Christian conservatives because the US is steeped in prosperity theology, where the point of worship is to deliver health and wealth to believers. Thus, "feed the hungry" and "show mercy for the poor" sounds needlessly political and "woke."

He’s weak on crime, I hear.

And I’ve heard people suggest it’s for solo practitioners, but I’m too risk averse to do anything other than answer it literally.

My firm opened a South Carolina office a few months ago. I looked at taking the bar (no comity). Question: “name everyone you’ve ever shared an office building with”

Parents weekend, Phi Mu, Ole Miss, 2008

News article would be shorter if you'd just link it. I'm not reading the article anyway.

Challenge: Get the Federal Circuit to accept a brief the first time.

Level: Impossible.

Helluva day to leave Canada and come back Stateside

The ACC Tournament, Greensboro, Tim Duncan

Watching the Blue Jays from space

Going to the Jays/Dodgers game in Toronto tomorrow for posterity.

ILL SEEK SANCTIONS

If somehow you are still working at DOJ you need to put down your pencil, stand up at your desk, and walk out.

The parameters he sets have to be insane. You have to fight every hypothetical, refuse to concede, and just double down on every dumb, random thought.

His line edits, made in Sharpie, are just every page of text crossed out and rewritten as “Do It or Else!”