The president said “Quiet, piggy” to a female reporter who asked him about the Epstein files—a continuation of his long-standing pattern of denigrating women. www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/...
If I wake up at 4 AM and my wife sleeps until 10 AM, that's microdosing divorce.
A picture of the beaver super moon with red trees.
What a slut.
Have you tried filling your kitchen sink with warm soapy water about it?
I was going to start a new diet for New Years but there's a bunch of old diets I haven't finish yet.
One good trick for remembering the names of new people in your life is to not bother with meeting new people.
I’m “Blockbuster and relax” years old.
White and red wine pairs well with different foods but both pair well with difficult relatives and annoying neighbors.
Ewww
Just burned 10,000 calories changing the battery in my key fob.
Just a reminder to wash your hands. Tis the season, gross people.
Perfect! Also…hiiii. 🙂
Exactly
My favourite thing about the Rainforest Café was when you beat one of their food challenges, you got to fuck a velociraptor.
Just when you think things can’t get worse, they just get awfuller and awfuller.
I want to be more sexual, I’ve decided to become a Disney adult.
My FBI handler just called and said my girlfriend and I are, “really, really gross.”
You can't satisfy me in bed,
you're not 7 pillows.
People say Bluesky is a futile waste of time, but that’s only if you’re doing it right
Pay attention to the music they send you.
Ha. I will check it out! Can’t wait.
My pleasure. I look forward to this day all year. Hope you and the fam have a great evening. ❤️ 🎂
He’s as good and as real as they come.
Please help me wish @joshmankiewicz.bsky.social a happy birthday! Josh, thank you for your friendship, support & incredible wit.
Attached is a @datelinenbc.bsky.social birthday mystery. So put your sound on & listen as the narrator “cracks the case!”
I adore you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
❤️🎉🎂
Men get constant shit for not being able to find the clit, meanwhile women are out there barely putting the tip in their mouth, or slob knobbing and twisting the whole thing like a piece of clay on a potters wheel.
I wonder if anyone, anywhere, at any time, has said, “Oh fuck yeah, Geoff, I just came.”
Dear loud sneezers,
Calm the fuck down.
Sincerely,
Everyone
Josh - thank you so much. This means everything to me. You’re up next.🎂❤️
Wishing the happiest of #Dateline birthdays to the spectacular @hunbothered.bsky.social ❤️🎂
