VERY COOL PERSON: It's four-twenty, you know what that means?

ME: Hell yeah! [starts shoving blackbirds into a pie]

is it? it seems to me the j is necessary to get the 'w' sound in there by analogy to Spanish and mariuana would be pronounced differently.

Artemis works well, but the big issue now is that there's no lander and there won't be one ready to land people on the moon until the 2030's

imagine discovering a full dinosaur skeleton…super cool, right??!

now imagine that dinosaur skeleton is wearing a jean jacket- hang on a sec i have to catch my breath

I don't have the strength

you read that entire thread without knowing the song? I don't how to say this gently, but you are in mental crisis and need help urgently

beware. if you do this you'll turn evil and end up looking like this

hold on, I'm getting to that!

[If you're still reading this, you need to find something better to do with your life. But I appreciate you and would totally put my heart in a blender so I could rendezvous with you and then ghost you without remorse. Tie me to the bedpost]

43/FIN

[Fourth and last chorus. He ends this song proudly repeating “rendezvous then I'm through with you.” Yes grunge and 90’s alt-rock was meant to open the door to greater emotional honesty in rock music. BUT NOT LIKE THIS]

42/

[The bridge then repeats with nearly identical lyrics. I will admit that the climax at the second “tie me to the bedpost,” leading into the last chorus, is the closest this gets to being actual music]

41/

[Also note that this is as close as we get to a resolution: the author’s demand that their partner accept a sexual relationship based on mutual hatred and loathing. Doesn't help that the tone is snide and superior]

40/

Sink when you get close tie me to the bedpost

[Not 100% sure what “Sink when you get close” means but it’s definitely horny. “Tie me to the bedpost” suggests that the author’s self-hatred also expresses itself through masochism]

39/

Make me blind when your eyes close

[The author becomes overwhelmed with passion when seeing this person, who they clearly detest, experience orgasm? Or is he emotionally projecting his own trauma so hard onto them that he thinks he's actually seeing through their eyes? Difficult to say]

38/

Take heed feed your ego

[He's really lost me here. But given what we’ve covered so far I don’t think this guy is remotely interested in feeding other people’s egos]

37/

[Even I got tired of this some time ago]

36/

The author thinks he's saying “you don’t know that I'm the only one you need.” But “alone” could equally modify “don’t know,” so it can equally mean “you need many people and know it, but you should know that I am also one of those people"]

35/

I alone am the one you don't know you need

[We have made it to the bridge. Thank god this is almost over. That being said, this is a sentence that would have caused my sixth grade English teacher to beat me with a phone book. Cont...

34/

[Third chorus. At this point I would gladly put his heart in the blender myself. And I would laugh]

33/

Demented as the motives in your head

[Okay never mind, that immediately turned to shit. Also darkly ironic that the guy who says "rendezvous then I'm through with you" FOUR TIMES in this song is impugning someone else’s motives]

32/

Folded up and just pretend

[Actually this is almost a decent metaphor. Like origami, the author is tightly folded in upon himself, resulting in a form in which he mimics that which he is not]

31/

Or am I origami

[Bro you’ve already been heart in a blender, a wicker cabinet, a frustrated clock, do we really have to keep doing this]

30/

[At this point the author appears to be experiencing narcissistic collapse and projecting their own negative feelings of self-worth, which they are clearly unable to process, onto their partner]

29/

I'm not as ugly sad as you

[The author has finally said something about the other person. But it's unclear as this could mean (1) they are both ugly and sad; (2) they are ugly when sad; or (3) “ugly” is an intensifier indicating extreme sadness due to being involved w/the guy from Eve 6]

28/

But it's not my state of mind

[Taken together, these last two lines are reminiscent of Chris Cornell’s classic lyric “I’m looking California, but feeling Minnesota” if Outshined had been written instead by a marginally literate dolt]

27/

So-Cal is where my mind states

[Not sure, but I think this means his mind is telling him he’s in Southern California? This song contains many crimes against grammar but this is one of the worst sentences ever written in the English language. Just absolutely brutal]

26/

[The second chorus repeats the lyrics of the first chorus. You will have to hear this identical chorus two more times before the song is finally over. They really thought they did something here]

25/

But my stomach turns and I exhale

[The ginger ale has failed, resulting only in a painful burp]

24/

I think sick like ginger ale

[Ginger ale here represents the author’s diseased thoughts, yet this makes no sense as either analogy or metonymy, because ginger ale is used to alleviate the symptoms of illness]

23/

I hear words in clips and phrases

[The author consumes an excessive amount of short form video]

22/