you know what movie is good? citizen kane. i am proud to be the first person to ever say this. i just love the part where he rosebuds

greenwood as gerald... peak shit heel greenwood

mcdonald's manager: show the new guy the ropes

me: yeah no prob *opens drawer* we use them to restrain grimace

Photo of a toyota with a bunch of cheese sauce splattered on it, caption reads "Somebody keeps throwing shitty taco bell cheese on my car. I'm about to review my camera to see the car doing it. Twice now. It's gross and you're littering. Grow up."

man if they used that sauce that way, you must have fucked up

"The Shining" limited edition box set

i have some cool dvds. it's my hobby and it's the only thing i spend disposable income on. this is the fucking coolest one i've ever bought and it's not close

[an awkward minute passes as Death struggles to pick up change from the countertop]
Death: (embarrassed) ha ha slippery coins
Drugstore Clerk: nah man it’s cuz you got them bone hands

DC Metro sign for the “Pentagon City” station.

Where the grass is [redacted] and the girls are [redacted].

On Monday, a woman posts a photo on her "supersausage_charlie" Instagram account. It shows a dog at a Holy Week event in Spain. The dog is dressed like the other religious figures at the event, which involves an all-white outfit and pointy white hat.

On Monday, a woman posts a photo on her "supersausage_charlie" Instagram account. It shows a dog at a Holy Week event in Spain. The dog is dressed like the other religious figures at the event, which involves an all-white outfit and pointy white hat. The caption reads: "Dachshund takes on Semana Santa 🐶✝️🐣 #dachshund #semanasanta #dogsofinstagram #potd #happyeaster"

On Friday, the same woman posts a photo of her dog sitting on their couch. The dog is again dressed in the same outfit. This time, they have a gold necklace with a Christian cross on his neck.

The caption for Friday's post reads: "‼️PLEASE READ‼️ For clarity: the post from a few days ago was a reference to Semana Santa, a Spanish religious and cultural tradition. It was not connected to extremism, racism, or politics in any way. This was already stated in the disclaimer, but it is clear that some either misunderstood that context or chose to ignore it. This account is a dachshund account, and it will remain a space dedicated purely to the joy, humor, and love of sharing life with my dog. Nothing beyond that. Some of the comments left under that post were deeply disturbing. Hate, racism, extremist language, and abusive behavior have no place here. They will be removed and reported immediately. I appreciate everyone who continues to engage with this page with respect, kindness, and the spirit in which it is intended. • #dachshund #semanasanta #potd #spanishtraditions #fypage"

I'm sorry, but this woman posting photos of her dog at a religious event in Spain and then having to frantically clarify a few days later at their "supersausage_charlie" Instagram account is something out of a Curb Your Enthusiasm episode.

the luddites are so misunderstood and it does the world such a disservice, they were so fucking cool and ahead of their time

i would argue the luddites weren't against any technology at all, they wanted a seat at the table to determine how it was used and to not become obselete as workers. they're best understood as a foundational part of the labor movement, imo

You have more in common with the people of Iran than you do with anyone in this administration, any member of the technocracy, anyone who is profiting from this war, or any billionaire. When you see Iranians forming human chains outside key infrastructure sites, you should feel a sense of kinship.

I’ve been thinking about this guy almost daily for ten fucking years. essentially my entire 30’s. when he finally croaks I imagine I’ll let out a sigh so deep it realigns my fucking spine

cigarettes are so fucking back

hey can someone like, do something

i agree tbf

NASA just dropped this image of Artemis II astronaut Christina Koch looking back at us. The first woman to ever see our planet in its entirety. I’m not crying you’re crying 🥹🔭🧪 📸: NASA

Iran just reportedly hit an Oracle data center in Dubai and i can't stop thinking about how good it would feel to see my tax dollars spent firing Tomahawk cruise missiles at data centers.

don't sign your posts

it's the antithesis of writing. it removes the most basic and crucial elements. it takes away the point of writing

old tweet by @mattytalks: Long term Twitter use has only 2 possible outcomes: 1) you become a overbearing politics obsessed scold 2) your brain becomes so diseased that you can only laugh at stuff like "it's ya boy tarantula dick"

that comes back to truly dumb and awesome effect

the snake oil salesmen get to fuck you up with actual snakes

I don’t love being in a society where you can sell enough pillows to do meaningful damage to democracy or sell enough children’s books to do a genocide or sell enough chicken sandwiches to abolish gay marriage

That all seems like a ridiculous way to do society to me

go fuck yourself

i can't come unless they say "this is real convergence" and the atmosphere is an empty warehouse in the meat district

this is fucking incredible ok bye

Here's a new song called "Do You Have Any Idea How Most People Live?"

got damn

Elon Musk@elonmusk My son, Saxon, is so based that he would just order milk when we went to dinner in LA. This would always stun the waitstaff, as they had never heard anyone actually order milk! He also unironically ordered a cheeseburger at a very uptight sushi restaurant that doesn’t even allow you to order supplemental soy sauce. When the waiter recovered from this request to reply that they don’t have cheeseburgers, Saxon said “Fine, I will have a hamburger.”

yes, absolutely, sir. extremely based. tremendous parenting.

it's just so beautiful