Why are we always seeking to “eliminate” “the toughest stains.” They deserve our respect

Love when you call the insurance company and they hit you with “Okay just so you know nothing I say today is a guarantee of payment or reimbursement, all claims are subject to rejection, everything I say is a lie; nothing is true; all likeness to any real people, living or dead, is
entirely coincid

The Beach Boys really said it when they sang “Christmas comes this time each year.”

Don’t tell anyone but I do the Arrested Development “Mayonegg” thing with almonds and raisins.

Update: DocuSign now allows you to sign in Blackadder ITC.

NBA court side banner ad: “I F E E L SLOVENIA”

If you’re a Planet Fitness Black Card holder they let you use the PF Bacta Tank.

That one “LARGE WITHDRAWAL ALERT” from your bank that changes everything 😝

Dreamt about a car called the Honda Pariah.

Studying in the Way of Dry Basement

I would eat the Mitt Romney sandwich.

Oscar Wilde called separating your recycling “the triumph of hope over experience.”

I know A Guy who 3D prints serviceable replica parts. I’ll send you his ICQ

You’re not imagining it; it should be 4PM right now. The heat is impacting the facility in Frederick, MD that manufactures linear time.

Trash night in 90° + 🙂

Oh no really

Getting a lot of Toucan-based lifestyle content served to me. Exotic bird lobby thinks they have me nailed.

Soup for my family

You’ve got a brass goblin. It’s okay, you can repel them with a pretty easy baking soda solution

Leave home and keep leavin’

The past isn’t over…it isn’t even past.

Enshrine Labor Day as a month-long observance.

Mother…Piggy…always you rage inside me

50% humidity. God smiles on humanity.

🧀😤🖕

I recently learned Honda discontinued the Fit in 2020. But even the light of dead stars still illuminate the sky…

Advancing ☝️

Copse spotted 😳

The MLB caption bot is not on here yet.