What do pornhub and Aldi have in common?

They both love a 3 bird roast.

Your wife has a tattoo above her vagina that reads (insert joke here).

I think we’ve been had. I think we’re being manipulated. I think social media in its current form is damaging to both us as individuals and society. I think I want to be free for a while.

Cool. I’ll follow you too mate.

It’s nice to see a white supremacists sticking to tradition by being arrested for assault instead of taking roles in government.

“We’re just two guys who pulled themselves up by their bootstraps. Never given anything by anyone”.

I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times I’ve had an accident with the band saw.

When a customer pulls out a massive wad of cash I like to play a little game I call “Builder or drug dealer”

Pluralism was the first casualty of social media.

It's #buyastrangerabook day!

People buy each other books cos they can & it's ace!

@sewfee.bsky.social went onto my website & sent me £20 to buy someone the book of their choice.

So, if there's a particular book you'd like courtesy of Sophie, get in touch!

UK only

Whenever people look at my dick pics they all say the same thing. “Is….is that a Fez?”

Just had my first “Have a nice Christmas”. Anyone beat that?

someone you find attractive at a funeral is a 'mourning would'

The bitcoin bots are easily startled but they’ll soon be back and in greater numbers.

I thought “middle class women of a certain age” was a category on Porn hub.
#greggwallace

Today at work for funsies I’m going to play how many coffees can an overweight middle aged man drink before he feels a tingle in his arm. I bet it’s 7.

My new Dr says I’m paranoid. I think he’s been talking to my old doctor.

man arm with goosebumps

Want to go to a used book store?

Me:

My mom when people try to help her in the kitchen

More like Black Thursday ammirite.

If your Chinese food is too bright you might want to dim sum.

If science can make a chia pet, then it can make wearable plants too... I want some cilantrousers, and I want them now.

Life keeps beating the living snot out of me and you’re over here moaning about getting Lemons.

It's #buyastrangerabook day!

People buy each other books cos they can and it's ace!

Earlier, @sewfee.bsky.social went onto my website and sent me £20 to buy someone the book of their choice.

So, if there's a book you'd like, get in touch!

UK only

People are often surprised when I tell them this: both Twitter and Facebook/insta/threads are now specifically engineered to downgrade, hide, suppress real journalism. If this platform is different, that's a huge change

I hope this email finds you because tbqh I don’t think I know who you are or what you do.

If you fart and cum at the same time, your vagina takes a screenshot.

On Tyranny Timothy Snyder…

I’ve decided very recently to read a lot of books about tyranny. I don’t know why…..