I need to start planning my next tattoo already but I already have my sentimental Keith Haring dog and my artsy delft blue flowers so idk is it time for me to get like something really ugly that’s just like on my body

Agreed with the caveat that I NEED that pocket door to latch and be flush to the wall if you’re expecting me to use a pocket door on a bathroom.

My TL has been absolutely flooded with adorable doe-eyed 20-somethings who think being a hairy fat white man is enough to be “daddy” while their vibes and aesthetics are definitively Baby. They should be at the club and getting a Gengar plushie/tattoo, not pretending to be sexually paternal doms.

Making the husband watch Gurren Lagann so he can understand what being a 2010s anime club president was like

Contemplating taking off work to drive 5 hours up to ATL for a concert for a band I only discovered because of my obsessive TTRPG character playlist hyperfixation? Perhaps.

You should never be ashamed of being The Hot Dog Man. Live your truth loud and proud at the DQ.

Thank youuuuu! 💖💖💖

Enjoy some highlights of me and the husband from our belated honeymoon cruise to Alaska last week! I did a terrible job taking pictures of just me so you get one of both of us and one of the back of my head.

I know few instantaneous rage responses as strong as when I’m on a call at the very end of the work day and people start having full on conversations about their kids on the call. It’s 4:30! Don’t you want to go spend time with your kids instead of talking at your captive coworkers about them?

So exhausted this morning and I don’t even have work to do so I’m just stuck at the office spiraling about how much I need sleep

It’s another day with another new shirt for the ungrateful masses at my office. All the more selfies for you, then, my dears.

God I’m in such a lousy mood because of how stressful work was today combined with a bunch of minor annoyances and with being a very productive boy. I need a scoop of peanut butter with my ADHD meds hidden inside like I’m a fussy golden retriever

I’ve been getting really into shanties and indie music and I promise it’s for a totally normal reason and not because I’ve been obsessively building and listening to character playlists for each of my weekly TTRPG characters

I mean you’re objectively correct but who am I to question the will of the Publix wine and beer section when it wants to present me with new manmade horrors beyond my comprehension?

I would wage class warfare if I were presented with a weed beer instead of the wretched “Hard Dunkin Donuts” malt beverage god intended for me to find when they sent me to the grocery store beer section

Ah yes the good old “it’s so hot and wet out why am I alive” season.

What should I get myself for dinner tonight while the husband is stuck in meetings until past 7pm?

I just wanna hang out and listen to slash read my little books and play my little RPGs is that so much to ask

My work bestie left last winter and nobody’s complimented my new shirt so I’ll break selfie hiatus to share a bear face pic for attention

Thought this meant, like, for an article in a Walmart magazine, which seemed like a real win to me!

My untagged spoiler now that I’ve watched it is that I wish 2015 fandom live-blogging culture had died and people could just like things normally instead of acting like that about shows like this.

The great thing about being here is that y'all are so horned up on Fridays that I don't have to worry about you spoiling Severance for me. Tiktok and Twitter are basically exclusively untagged spoilers at the moment.

I can finally mostly talk again which is great because my four Pathfinder sessions this week would've been real awkward if I couldn't speak.

Spent the entire day playing The Roottrees are Dead with my husband and then we started up Roottreemania and both yelled “Oh fuck you!!” immediately when the first character showed up.

Came over from my locked hell site TL just to comment that I’m obsessed with your sweater wow!

Florida loves a bathroom where the sink is outside of the bathroom so you’ve gotta get your germs all over a second door before you can wash your hands but I’ve never seen that demonic move called a “.25 Bathroom”

Thank you, lovely. Not the best way to start a week but we shall survive!

Going to lay down on the floor and scream because I made a dumb mistake at work and everybody is either being condescendingly nice or making me feel like the biggest idiot ever when I just want them to let me fix the mistake because I think I know how to do so.

“She should be at the club” Wrong. She should be at the cinema watching the hit comedy One of Them Days starring Keke Palmer and Sza

Shout out to the twentyish person Slavic TikTok cult that just walked into the small restaurant in the hipster part of town like they’d be able to seat their entire parish